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The Rhyme Of Triangular Tommy
by [?]

Triangular Tommy, one morning in May,
Went out for a walk on the public highway.
Just here I will say,
‘Twas a bright sunny day,
And the sky it was blue, and the grass it was green,
The same sky and grass that you’ve all of you seen;
And the birds in the trees sang their usual song,
And Triangular Tommy went trudging along.

But I can tell you
He cared naught for the view.
He did just what small boys of his age always do:
He shouted out “Scat!”
At a wandering cat,
And he picked a big daisy to stick in his hat;
The clovers he topped,
And the toadstools he cropped,
And sometimes he scuffled and sometimes he hopped.

He took an old stick and poked at a worm,
And merrily chuckled to see the thing squirm;
When he chanced to look up, and in gorgeous array
Triangular Tilly was coming his way.
Triangular Tom straightened up in a jiff,
And put on his best manner–exceedingly stiff;
And as far as his angular shape would allow
Triangular Tom made a beautiful bow.

Triangular Tilly went smilingly by,
With a glance that was friendly, but just a bit shy.
And Tom so admired her that after she passed,
A backward look over his shoulder he cast.
And he said, “Though I think many girls are but silly,
I really admire that Triangular Tilly.”

But soon all such thoughts were put out of his head,
For who should come by but Triangular Ted,
The very boy Tom had been wishing to see!
“Hello!” said Triangular Tommy, said he.
“Hello!” said Triangular Ted, and away
Those two children scooted to frolic and play.
And they had, on the green,
Where ’twas all dry and clean,
The best game of leap-frog that ever was seen.
Triangular Tom beat down this way, you know,
And Triangular Ted stood beside him, just so,
When one, two, three–go!
With the greatest gusto,
Ted flew over Tom in a manner not slow.

They played hide-and-seek, they played marbles and tag,
They played they were soldiers, and each waved a flag;
Till at last they confessed,
They wanted to rest;
So they sat down and chatted with laughter and jest;

When Schoolmaster Jones they suddenly spied,
Come clumping along with his pedagogue stride,
As usual, with manner quite preoccupied;
With his hat on one side,
And his shoe-lace untied–
A surly old fellow, it can’t be denied;
And each wicked boy
Thought that he would enjoy
An occasion the thoughtful old man to annoy,
And all of his wise calculations destroy.
So they thought they’d employ
A means known to each boy.
And across the wide pavement they fastened a twine
Exceedingly strong but exceedingly fine;
And Triangular Tommy laughed out in his glee,
To think how upset the old master would be!

Although very wicked, their mischievous scheme
Was a perfect success; and with a loud scream,
A horrible clash,
A thump and a smash,
Old Schoolmaster Jones came down with a crash.
His hat rolled away, and his spectacles broke,
And those dreadful boys thought it a howling good joke.
And they just doubled up in immoderate glee,
Saying, “Look at the Schoolmaster!
Tee-hee! tee-hee!”

Tom gave a guffaw,
And Ted roared a “haw-haw”;
But soon their diversion was turned into awe,
For old Schoolmaster Jones was angry, they saw.

Triangular Ted
Turned swiftly and fled,
And far down the street like a reindeer he sped,
Leaving Tommy to face the old gentleman’s rage,
Who quickly jumped up,–he was brisk for his age,–
And with just indignation portrayed on his face,
To Triangular Tommy he quickly gave chase.

And hearing his squeals
And his frantic appeals,
Triangular Tommy fast took to his heels.
Now Tommy was agile and Tommy was spry;
He whizzed through the air–he just seemed to fly;
He rushed madly on, until, dreadful to say!
He came where the railroad was just in his way–
And alas! and alack!
He tripped on the track
And then with a terrible, sudden ker-thwack!
Triangular Tommy sprawled flat on his back–
And the train came along with a crash, and a crack,
A din, and a clatter, a clang, and a clack,
A toot, and a boom, and a roar, and a hiss,
And chopped him up all into pieces like this–
If you cut out papers just like them, why, then,
If you try, you can put him together again.