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The By Any Other Name
by [?]

First the teacher called the roll,
Clos’t to the beginnin’,
“Addeliney Bowersox!”
Set the school a-grinnin’.
Wintertime, and stingin’-cold
When the session took up–
Cold as we all looked at her,
Though she couldn’t look up!

Total stranger to us, too–
Country-folks ain’t allus
Nigh so shameful unpolite
As some people call us!–
But the honest facts is, then,
Addeliney Bower-
Sox’s feelin’s was so hurt
She cried half an hour!

My dest was acrost from her ‘n:
Set and watched her tryin’
To p’tend she didn’t keer,
And a kind o’ dryin’
Up her tears with smiles—tel I
Thought, “Well, ‘Addeliney
‘ is plain, but she’s
Purty as a piney!”

It’s be’n many of a year
Sence that most oncommon
Cur’ous name o’ Bowersox
Struck me so abomin-
Nubble and outlandish-like!–
I changed it to Adde-
Liney Daubenspeck–and that
Nearly killed her Daddy!