FullReads

57.

There was an Old Man of Cape Horn,
Who wished he had never been born;
So he sat on a chair,
Till he died of despair,
That dolorous Man of Cape Horn.

58.

There was an Old Lady whose folly,
Induced her to sit in a holly;
Whereon by a thorn,
Her dress being torn,
She quickly became melancholy.

59.

There was an Old Man of Corfu,
Who never knew what he should do;
So he rushed up and down,
Till the sun made him brown,
That bewildered Old Man of Corfu.

60.

There was an Old Man of the South,
Who had an immoderate mouth;
But in swallowing a dish,
That was quite full of fish,
He was choked, that Old Man of the South.

61.

There was an Old Man of the Nile,
Who sharpened his nails with a file;
Till he cut off his thumbs,
And said calmly, “This comes–
Of sharpening one’s nails with a file!”

62.

There was an Old Person of Rheims,
Who was troubled with horrible dreams;
So, to keep him awake,
They fed him with cake,
Which amused that Old Person of Rheims.

63.

There was an Old Person of Cromer,
Who stood on one leg to read Homer;
When he found he grew stiff,
He jumped over the cliff,
Which concluded that Person of Cromer.

64.

There was an Old Person of Troy,
Whose drink was warm brandy and soy;
Which he took with a spoon,
By the light of the moon,
In sight of the city of Troy.

65.

There was an Old Man of the Dee,
Who was sadly annoyed by a flea;
When he said, “I will scratch it,”
They gave him a hatchet,
Which grieved that Old Man of the Dee.

66.

There was an Old Man of Dundee,
Who frequented the top of a tree;
When disturbed by the crows,
He abruptly arose,
And exclaimed, “I’ll return to Dundee.”

67.

There was an Old Person of Tring,
Who embellished his nose with a ring;
He gazed at the moon,
Every evening in June,
That ecstatic Old Person of Tring.

68.

There was an Old Man on some rocks,
Who shut his wife up in a box;
When she said, “Let me out,”
He exclaimed, “Without doubt,
You will pass all your life in that box.”

69.

There was an Old Man of Coblenz,
The length of whose legs was immense;
He went with one prance,
From Turkey to France,
That surprising Old Man of Coblenz.

70.

There was an Old Man of Calcutta,
Who perpetually ate bread and butter;
Till a great bit of muffin,
On which he was stuffing,
Choked that horrid old man of Calcutta.

71.

There was an Old Man in a pew,
Whose waistcoat was spotted with blue;
But he tore it in pieces,
To give to his nieces,–
That cheerful Old Man in a pew.

72.

There was an Old Man who said, “How,–
Shall I flee from this horrible Cow?
I will sit on this stile,
And continue to smile,
Which may soften the heart of that Cow.”

73.

There was a Young Lady of Hull,
Who was chased by a virulent Bull;
But she seized on a spade,
And called out–“Who’s afraid!”
Which distracted that virulent Bull.

74.

There was an Old Man of Whitehaven,
Who danced a quadrille with a Raven;
But they said–“It’s absurd,
To encourage this bird!”
So they smashed that Old Man of Whitehaven.