FullReads

MLLE. Y.
[Shrieks with laughter.]

MME. X.
And then he comes home and has to hunt for his slippers which Marie has stuck under the chiffonier–oh, but it’s sinful to sit here and make fun of one’s husband this way when he is kind and a good little man. You ought to have had such a husband, Amelie. What are you laughing at? What? What? And you see he’s true to me. Yes, I’m sure of that, because he told me himself–what are you laughing at?–that when I was touring in Norway that that brazen Frêdêrique came and wanted to seduce him! Can you fancy anything so infamous? [Pause.] I’d have torn her eyes out if she had come to see him when I was at home. [Pause.] It was lucky that Bob told me about it himself and that it didn’t reach me through gossip. [Pause.] But would you believe it, Frêdêrique wasn’t the only one! I don’t know why, but the women are crazy about my husband. They must think he has influence about getting them theatrical engagements, because he is connected with the government. Perhaps you were after him yourself. I didn’t use to trust you any too much. But now I know he never bothered his head about you, and you always seemed to have a grudge against him someway.

[Pause. They look at each other in a puzzled way.]

MME. X.
Come and see us this evening, Amelie, and show us that you’re not put out with us,–not put out with me at any rate. I don’t know, but I think it would be uncomfortable to have you for an enemy. Perhaps it’s because I stood in your way [rallentando] or–I really–don’t know why–in particular.

[Pause. Mlle. Y. stares at Mme. X curiously.]

MME. X
[Thoughtfully].

Our acquaintance has been so queer. When I saw you for the first time I was afraid of you, so afraid that I didn’t dare let you out of my sight; no matter when or where, I always found myself near you–I didn’t dare have you for an enemy, so I became your friend. But there was always discord when you came to our house, because I saw that my husband couldn’t endure you, and the whole thing seemed as awry to me as an ill-fitting gown–and I did all I could to make him friendly toward you, but with no success until you became engaged. Then came a violent friendship between you, so that it looked all at once as though you both dared show your real feelings only when you were secure–and then–how was it later? I didn’t get jealous–strange to say! And I remember at the christening, when you acted as godmother, I made him kiss you–he did so, and you became so confused–as it were; I didn’t notice it then–didn’t think about it later, either–have never thought about it until–now! [Rises suddenly.] Why are you silent? You haven’t said a word this whole time, but you have let me go on talking! You have sat there, and your eyes have reeled out of me all these thoughts which lay like raw silk in its cocoon–thoughts–suspicious thoughts, perhaps. Let me see–why did you break your engagement? Why do you never come to our house any more? Why won’t you come to see us tonight?

[Mlle. Y. appears as if about to speak.]

MME. X.
Hush, you needn’t speak–I understand it all! It was because–and because–and because! Yes, yes! Now all the accounts balance. That’s it. Fie, I won’t sit at the same table with you. [Moves her things to another table.] That’s the reason I had to embroider tulips–which I hate–on his slippers, because you are fond of tulips; that’s why [Throws slippers on the floor] we go to Lake M�larn in the summer, because you don’t like salt water; that’s why my boy is named Eskil–because it’s your father’s name; that’s why I wear your colors, read your authors, eat your favorite dishes, drink your drinks–chocolate, for instance; that’s why–oh–my God–it’s terrible, when I think about it; it’s terrible. Everything, everything came from you to me, even your passions. Your soul crept into mine, like a worm into an apple, ate and ate, bored and bored, until nothing was left but the rind and a little black dust within. I wanted to get away from you, but I couldn’t; you lay like a snake and charmed me with your black eyes; I felt that when I lifted my wings they only dragged me down; I lay in the water with bound feet, and the stronger I strove to keep up the deeper I worked myself down, down, until I sank to the bottom, where you lay like a giant crab to clutch me in your claws–and there I am lying now.