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I sought the street, I could not bear
To hear my mother moaning there.
I clutched the paper in my hand.
‘Twas hard. You cannot understand . . .
I walked as martyr to the flame,
Almost exalted in my shame.
They turned, who heard my voiceless cry,
“For Sale, a virgin, who will buy?”
And so myself I fiercely sold,
And clutched the price, a piece of gold.
Into a pharmacy I pressed;
I took the paper from my breast.
I gave my money . . . how it gleamed!
How precious to my eyes it seemed!
And then I saw the chemist frown,
Quick on the counter throw it down,
Shake with an angry look his head:
“Your louis d’or is bad,” he said.

Dazed, crushed, I went into the night,
I clutched my gleaming coin so tight.
No, no, I could not well believe
That any one could so deceive.
I tried again and yet again–
Contempt, suspicion and disdain;
Always the same reply I had:
“Get out of this. Your money’s bad.”

Heart broken to the room I crept,
To mother’s side. All still . . . she slept . . .
I bent, I sought to raise her head . . .
“Oh, God, have pity!” she was dead.

That’s how it all began.
Said I: Revenge is sweet.
So in my guilty span
I’ve ruined many a man.
They’ve groveled at my feet,
I’ve pity had for none;
I’ve bled them every one.
Oh, I’ve had interest for
That worthless louis d’or.

But now it’s over; see,
I care for no one, me;
Only at night sometimes
In dreams I hear the chimes
Of wedding-bells and see
A woman without stain
With children at her knee.
Ah, how you comfort me,
Cocaine! . . .