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Bridegroom Dick
by
In function his fellows their fellowship merge–
The twain standing nigh–the two boatswain’s
mates,
Sailors of his grade, ay, and brothers of his
mess.
With sharp thongs adroop the junior one
awaits
The word to uplift.
“Untie him–so!
Submission is enough, Man, you may go.”
Then, promenading aft, brushing fat Purser
Smart,
“Flog? Never meant it–hadn’t any heart.
Degrade that tall fellow? “–Such, wife, was he,
Old Captain Turret, who the brave wine could
stow.
Magnanimous, you think?–But what does
Dick see?
Apron to your eye! Why, never fell a blow;
Cheer up, old wifie, ‘t was a long time ago.
But where’s that sore one, crabbed and-severe,
Lieutenant Lon Lumbago, an arch scrutineer?
Call the roll to-day, would he answer–Here!
When the Blixum’s fellows to quarters
mustered
How he’d lurch along the lane of gun-crews
clustered,
Testy as touchwood, to pry and to peer.
Jerking his sword underneath larboard arm,
He ground his worn grinders to keep himself
calm.
Composed in his nerves, from the fidgets set
free,
Tell, Sweet Wrinkles, alive now is he,
In Paradise a parlor where the even
tempers be?
Where’s Commander All-a-Tanto?
Where’s Orlop Bob singing up from below?
Where’s Rhyming Ned? has he spun his last
canto?
Where’s Jewsharp Jim? Where’s Ringadoon
Joe?
Ah, for the music over and done,
The band all dismissed save the droned
trombone!
Where’s Glenn o’ the gun-room, who loved
Hot-Scotch–
Glen, prompt and cool in a perilous watch?
Where’s flaxen-haired Phil? a gray lieutenant?
Or rubicund, flying a dignified pennant?
But where sleeps his brother?–the cruise it was
o’er,
But ah, for death’s grip that welcomed him
ashore!
Where’s Sid, the cadet, so frank in his brag,
Whose toast was audacious–“Here’s Sid, and
Sid’s flag!”
Like holiday-craft that have sunk unknown,
May a lark of a lad go lonely down?
Who takes the census under the sea?
Can others like old ensigns be,
Bunting I hoisted to flutter at the gaff–
Rags in end that once were flags
Gallant streaming from the staff?
Such scurvy doom could the chances deal
To Top-Gallant Harry and Jack Genteel?
Lo, Genteel Jack in hurricane weather,
Shagged like a bear, like a red lion roaring;
But O, so fine in his chapeau and feather,
In port to the ladies never once jawing;
All bland politesse, how urbane was he–
“Oui, mademoiselle”–“Ma chere amie!”
‘T was Jack got up the ball at Naples,
Gay in the old Ohio glorious;
His hair was curled by the berth-deck barber,
Never you’d deemed him a cub of rude Boreas;
In tight little pumps, with the grand dames in
rout,
A-flinging his shapely foot all about;
His watch-chain with love’s jeweled tokens
abounding,
Curls ambrosial shaking out odors,
Waltzing along the batteries, astounding
The gunner glum and the grim-visaged loaders.
Wife, where be all these blades, I wonder,
Pennoned fine fellows, so strong, so gay?
Never their colors with a dip dived under;
Have they hauled them down in a lack-lustre
day,
Or beached their boats in the Far, Far Away?
Hither and thither, blown wide asunder,
Where’s this fleet, I wonder and wonder.
Slipt their cables, rattled their adieu,
(Whereaway pointing? to what rendezvous?)
Out of sight, out of mind, like the crack
Constitution,
And many a keel time never shall renew–
Bon Homme Dick o’ the buff Revolution,
The Black Cockade and the staunch True-Blue.
Doff hats to Decatur! But where is his blazon?
Must merited fame endure time’s wrong–
Glory’s ripe grape wizen up to a raisin?
Yes! for Nature teems, and the years are
strong,
And who can keep the tally o’ the names that
fleet along!