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Washington Crossing the Delaware
by
WASHINGTON
Your name is John Honeyman?
HONEYMAN
That’s me, sir, an’ I promised Marthy–that’s
my wife, sir–that I’d come to see ye–and
I come, an’ here I be!
WASHINGTON
And what can I do for you, Mr. Honeyman?
HONEYMAN
Nary a thing, General Washington.
WASHINGTON
Then what–?
HONEYMAN
I come to make ye an offer.
WASHINGTON
Well?
HONEYMAN
I’m in a way to find out a lot o’ things
that’s goin’ on in the British Army.
WASHINGTON
So?
HONEYMAN
Aye, ye see, I’m a butcher.
WASHINGTON
Well?
HONEYMAN
An’ I’ve got a contract to supply the
redcoats with beef. Now they think I’m
a good Tory! But General, I ain’t!
WASHINGTON
I’m glad to hear that!
HONEYMAN
An’ I figgered that mebbe I could find out things
an’ tell ye about ’em–if we could fix things up.
WASHINGTON
How much do you want for your information?
HONEYMAN
No! No! General! I ain’t tryin’ to sell ye nothin’!
WASHINGTON
I beg your pardon, Mr. Honeyman.
But I have so many insincere offers.
HONEYMAN
I know–I know! I hear folks talk. They think I’m a
Tory! Wal’, sir, I want they should keep on a-thinkin’ it!
I cal’ate if I’m a-goin’ to be any use to ye, nobody must
know I ain’t a rip-roarin’ all-fired Tory.
WASHINGTON
Certainly!
HONEYMAN
An’ that’s the why I wouldn’t tell none
o’ yer men what my name er my business was.
WASHINGTON
Mr. Honeyman, you’ve shown extraordinary good sense!
You’re exactly the man I’ve been looking for! I’m in
desperate need of reliable information. And I believe
you’re the man to get it for me.
HONEYMAN
I cal’ate I be.
WASHINGTON
Have you any information now?
HONEYMAN
A mite.
WASHINGTON
Well?
HONEYMAN
Lord Cornwallis is bringin’ 15,000 men
across the Hudson tonight, to git ye.
WASHINGTON
We’ll be gone.
HONEYMAN
That’s fu’st-rate! Now I’ll be goin’–an’ I’ll keep
ye informed when I know anything ye ought to know.
WASHINGTON
Just a moment, Honeyman. How are you going
to get your information to me?
HONEYMAN
Wal’, I figger I might come to see ye–
WASHINGTON
No, you’d be sure to excite suspicion.
HONEYMAN
I’d be as keerful as could be.
WASHINGTON
No–I mustn’t even let my own men
know you’re working for me.
HONEYMAN
Wal’–ye might have me captured now an’ agin–tell yer men I’m a notorious Tory–an’ have ’em be on the lookout fer me particular! Then when I’ve got something fer ye, I’ll put myself in the way o’ gittin’ captured.
WASHINGTON
Good! That’s an excellent idea. I’ll have to
give you a pretty bad name with my troops.
HONEYMAN
Pshaw–I don’t mind that, sir.
WASHINGTON
And I don’t know how I can reward you.
HONEYMAN
I don’t need no reward to help ye, General Washington,
I got a duty to do that!–There’s only jest one thing, sir–
WASHINGTON
Yes?
HONEYMAN
I’d sorta–er–kinda like my wife an’ children
protected from the–wal’–the results o’ my bein’
an active an’ notorious Tory.
WASHINGTON
Of course.
HONEYMAN
Ye see, I don’t mind what folks think o’ me,
but Marthy–that’s my wife, sir–she an’ the
young un’s might git–wal’–treated pretty shabby.