FullReads

“Ole Daddy must use up a pow’ful sight of wood; every time I’ve passed by his shanty he’s been makin’ the chips fly. But what gets me is, that the pile don’t seem to come down,” said Whisky Dick to his neighbor.

“Well, you derned fool!” growled his neighbor, “spose some chap happens to pass by thar, and sees the old man doin’ a man’s work at eighty, and slouches like you and me lying round drunk, and that chap, feelin’ kinder humped, goes up some dark night and heaves a load of cut pine over his fence, who’s got anything to say about it? Say?” Certainly not the speaker, who had done the act suggested, nor the penitent and remorseful hearer, who repeated it next day.

The pies and cakes made by the old woman were, I think, remarkable rather for their inducing the same loyal and generous spirit than for their intrinsic excellence, and it may be said appealed more strongly to the nobler aspirations of humanity than its vulgar appetite. Howbeit, everybody ate Mammy Downey’s pies, and thought of his childhood. “Take ’em, dear boys,” the old lady would say; “it does me good to see you eat ’em; reminds me kinder of my poor Sammy, that, ef he’d lived, would hev been ez strong and beg ez you be, but was taken down with lung fever, at Sweetwater. I kin see him yet; that’s forty year ago, dear! comin’ out o’ the lot to the bake-house, and smilin’ such a beautiful smile, like yours, dear boy, as I handed him a mince or a lemming turnover. Dear, dear, how I do run on! and those days is past! but I seems to live in you again!” The wife of the hotel-keeper, actuated by a low jealousy, had suggested that she “seemed to live OFF them;” but as that person tried to demonstrate the truth of her statement by reference to the cost of the raw material used by the old lady, it was considered by the camp as too practical and economical for consideration. “Besides,” added Cy Perkins, “ef old Mammy wants to turn an honest penny in her old age, let her do it. How would you like your old mother to make pies on grub wages? eh?” A suggestion that so affected his hearer (who had no mother) that he bought three on the spot. The quality of these pies had never been discussed but once. It is related that a young lawyer from San Francisco, dining at the Palmetto restaurant, pushed away one of Mammy Downey’s pies with every expression of disgust and dissatisfaction. At this juncture, Whisky Dick, considerably affected by his favorite stimulant, approached the stranger’s table, and, drawing up a chair, sat uninvited before him.

“Mebbee, young man,” he began gravely, “ye don’t like Mammy Downey’s pies?”

The stranger replied curtly, and in some astonishment, that he did not, as a rule, “eat pie.”

“Young man,” continued Dick, with drunken gravity, “mebbee you’re accustomed to Charlotte rusks and blue mange; mebbee ye can’t eat unless your grub is got up by one o’ them French cooks’? Yet WE–us boys yar in this camp–calls that pie–a good–a com-pe-tent pie!”

The stranger again disclaimed anything but a general dislike of that form of pastry.

“Young man,” continued Dick, utterly unheeding the explanation,–“young man, mebbee you onst had an ole–a very ole mother, who, tottering down the vale o’ years, made pies. Mebbee, and it’s like your blank epicurean soul, ye turned up your nose on the ole woman, and went back on the pies, and on her! She that dandled ye when ye woz a baby,–a little baby! Mebbee ye went back on her, and shook her, and played off on her, and gave her away–dead away! And now, mebbee, young man–I wouldn’t hurt ye for the world, but mebbee, afore ye leave this yar table, YE’LL EAT THAT PIE!”