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The Tale Of Chloe: An Episode In The History Of Beau Beamish
by
‘The chariot is trotting down the hill. He has ridden back. She has no attendant horseman.’
‘They were dismissed at my injunction ten miles off particularly to the benefit of the cavaliering horde, it would appear. In the case of a woman, Chloe, one blink of the eyelids is an omission of watchfulness.’
‘That is an axiom fit for the harem of the Grand Signior.’
‘The Grand Signior might give us profitable lessons for dealing with the sex.’
‘Distrust us, and it is a declaration of war!’
‘Trust you, and the stopper is out of the smelling-bottle.’
‘Mr. Beamish, we are women, but we have souls.’
‘The pip in the apple whose ruddy cheek allures little Tommy to rob the orchard is as good a preservative.’
‘You admit that men are our enemies?’
‘I maintain that they carry the banner of virtue.’
‘Oh, Mr. Beamish, I shall expire.’
‘I forbid it in my lifetime, Chloe, for I wish to die believing in one woman.’
‘No flattery for me at the expense of my sisters!’
‘Then fly to a hermitage; for all flattery is at somebody’s expense, child. ‘Tis an essence-extract of humanity! To live on it, in the fashion of some people, is bad–it is downright cannibal. But we may sprinkle our handkerchiefs with it, and we should, if we would caress our noses with an air. Society, my Chloe, is a recommencement upon an upper level of the savage system; we must have our sacrifices. As, for instance, what say you of myself beside our booted bumpkin squires?’
‘Hundreds of them, Mr. Beamish !’
‘That is a holocaust of squires reduced to make an incense for me, though you have not performed Druid rites and packed them in gigantic osier ribs. Be philosophical, but accept your personal dues. Grant us ours too. I have a serious intention to preserve this young duchess, and I expect my task to be severe. I carry the banner aforesaid; verily and penitentially I do. It is an error of the vulgar to suppose that all is dragon in the dragon’s jaws.’
‘Men are his fangs and claws.’
‘Ay, but the passion for his fiery breath is in woman. She will take her leap and have her jump, will and will! And at the point where she will and she won’t, the dragon gulps and down she goes! However, the business is to keep our buttercup duchess from that same point. Is she near?’
‘I can see her,’ said Chloe.
Beau Beamish requested a sketch of her, and Chloe began: ‘She is ravishing.’
Upon which he commented, ‘Every woman is ravishing at forty paces, and still more so in imagination.’
‘Beautiful auburn hair, and a dazzling red and white complexion, set in a blue coif.’
‘Her eyes?’
‘Melting blue.’
”Tis an English witch!’ exclaimed the beau, and he compassionately invoked her absent lord.
Chloe’s optics were no longer tasked to discern the fair lady’s lineaments, for the chariot windows came flush with those of the beau on the broad plateau of the hill. His coach door was opened. He sat upright, levelling his privileged stare at Duchess Susan until she blushed.
‘Ay, madam,’ quoth he, ‘I am not the first.’
‘La, sir!’ said she; ‘who are you?’
The beau deliberately raised his hat and bowed. ‘He, madam, of whose approach the gentleman who took his leave of you on yonder elevation informed you.’
She looked artlessly over her shoulder, and at the beau alighting from his carriage. ‘A gentleman?’
‘On horseback.’
The duchess popped her head through the window on an impulse to measure the distance between the two hills.
‘Never!’ she cried.
‘Why, madam, did he deliver no message to announce me?’ said the beau, ruffling.
‘Goodness gracious! You must be Mr. Beamish,’ she replied.
He laid his hat on his bosom, and invited her to quit her carriage for a seat beside him. She stipulated, ‘If you are really Mr. Beamish?’ He frowned, and raised his head to convince her; but she would not be impressed, and he applied to Chloe to establish his identity. Hearing Chloe’s name, the duchess called out, ‘Oh! there, now, that’s enough, for Chloe’s my maid here, and I know she’s a lady born, and we’re going to be friends. Hand me to Chloe. And you are Chloe?’ she said, after a frank stride from step to step of the carriages. ‘And don’t mind being my maid? You do look a nice, kind creature. And I see you’re a lady born; I know in a minute. You’re dark, I’m fair; we shall suit. And tell me– hush!–what dreadful long eyes he has! I shall ask you presently what you think of me. I was never at the Wells before. Dear me! the coach has turned. How far off shall we hear the bells to say I’m coming? I know I’m to have bells. Mr. Beamish, Mr. Beamish! I must have a chatter with a woman, and I’m in awe of you, sir, that I am, but men and men I see to talk to for a lift of my finger, by the dozen, in my duke’s palace–though they’re old ones, that’s true–but a woman who’s a lady, and kind enough to be my maid, I haven’t met yet since I had the right to wear a coronet. There, I’ll hold Chloe’s hand, and that’ll do. You would tell me at once, Chloe, if I was not dressed to your taste; now, wouldn’t you? As for talkative, that’s a sign with me of my liking people. I really don’t know what to say to my duke sometimes. I sit and think it so funny to be having a duke instead of a husband. You’re off!’