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PAGE 9

The Snoring Ghost
by [?]

“Our intelligent attention had gained favour for us; and we were introduced to these ladies as ‘daughters of a very dear friend of mine, whom I have not seen for years,’ on which one lady gave a sweet glance and a tight smile and murmured:

“‘So pleasant to renew acquaintance in the children;’ and the other ladies gave sweet glances, and tight smiles also, and echoed:

“‘So pleasant!’

“‘Such sensible girls!’ said our hostess, as if we were not there; ‘like women of fifty. So like their dear mother! Such treasures to my little Lucy! You know she has lost her dear sister,’ etc., etc.

“For then the ladies drew together, and our hostess having got a fresh audience, we retired to distant arm-chairs, a good deal bewildered.

“But to return to our first evening.

“Miss Lucy and we retired together, and no sooner had the drawing-room door closed behind us, than she wound her arms round our waists, and became as devoted as if we had been side by side the whole evening.

“‘I’ll tell you what I’ll do, my dear girls,’ she said when we reached our room; ‘I’ll come and sleep with you (there’s lots of room for three), and then I can go on about Cecilia’s affair, and if we don’t finish to-night we can go on to-morrow morning before we get up. I always wake early, so I can call you. I’ll come back when I’m ready for bed.’

“And she vanished.

“We were in bed when she returned. Her hair had been undergoing some wonderful process, and was now stowed away under a large and elaborate night-cap.

“‘Bedford was so slow,’ said she; ‘and then, you know, I got into bed, and let her tidy the room, and then when she was fairly gone, out I got, and here I am. We shall be as comfortable as possible; I’ll be in the middle, and then I can have you on each side of me, my dear girls;’ and in she sprang.

“‘Did you notice this?’ she asked, holding up her hand, and pointing out the edging on the sleeve of her night-dress; ‘it’s a new pattern; do you know it? Oh! my dears, the yards and yards of tatting that Cecilia had for her trousseau!’

“Fatima and I were not rich in tatting edges, and rejoiced when the conversation took another turn.

“‘About the proposal,’ she rambled on; ‘do you know I don’t really know whereabouts Henry (that is the major, my brother-in-law,’ she added, with one of the little attacks of dignity to which she was subject) ‘proposed or what he said. I asked Cecy, but she wouldn’t tell me. She was very cross, often; I’m very glad she’s married. I think sisters ought to marry off as fast as they can; they never get on well in a house together, you know.’

“I fairly gasped at this idea, and Fatima said bluntly:

“‘There are lots of us, and we get on.

“‘Ah!’ said Miss Lucy, in tones of wisdom; ‘wait till you’re a little older, and you’ll see. Cecy was at school with two sisters who hated each other like poison, and they were obliged to dress alike, and the younger wore out her things much faster than the other one, but she was obliged to wear them till her sister’s were done. She used to wish so her sister would marry, Cecy said, and the best fun is, now they’re both in love with the same man. He’s the curate of the church they go to.’

“‘Which of them is he in love with?’ I asked.

“‘Oh, neither that I know of,’ said Miss Lucy, composedly. ‘They don’t know him, you know; but they sit close under the pulpit, and they have such struggles about which shall get into the corner of the pew that’s nearest. Cecy and I weren’t like that; but still I’m very glad she’s married. Now wasn’t it stupid of her not to tell me? I should never have told anybody, you know. And don’t you wonder what gentlemen do say, and how they say it? He couldn’t propose sitting, and I think standing would be very awkward. I suppose he knelt. Aunt Maria doesn’t approve of gentlemen kneeling; she says it’s idolatry. I think they must look very silly. Cecy wouldn’t even tell me what he said. She said he spoke to mamma, and mamma said his conduct was highly honourable; but I think it was very stupid. Do you know, my dears, I have a cousin who was really married at Gretna Green? She married an officer. He was splendidly handsome; but people said things against him, and her parents objected. So they eloped, and then went to Wales, to such a lovely place! Wasn’t it romantic? They quarrelled afterwards though; he lives abroad now. People ought to be careful. I shall be very careful myself; I mean to refuse the first few offers I get.’