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The Nest Egg
by
“They’ll be a nice-looking couple,” ses his wife, looking at a young chap, named George Smith, that ‘ad been sitting next to Emma.
Charlie Tagg filled ‘is mouth with bread and butter, and wondered ‘ow he was to begin. He squeezed Emma’s ‘and just for the sake of keeping up appearances, and all the time ‘e was thinking of the other gal waiting for ‘im thousands o’ miles away.
“You’ve come ‘ome just in the nick o’ time,” ses old Cook; “if you’d done it o’ purpose you couldn’t ‘ave arranged it better.”
“Somebody’s birthday?” ses Charlie, trying to smile.
Old Cook shook his ‘ead. “Though mine is next Wednesday,” he ses, “and thank you for thinking of it. No; you’re just in time for the biggest bargain in the chandlery line that anybody ever ‘ad a chance of. If you ‘adn’t ha’ come back we should have ‘ad to ha’ done it without you.”
“Eighty pounds,” ses Mrs. Cook, smiling at Charlie. “With the money Emma’s got saved and your wages this trip you’ll ‘ave plenty. You must come round arter tea and ‘ave a look at it.”
“Little place not arf a mile from ‘ere,” ses old Cook. “Properly worked up, the way Emma’ll do it, it’ll be a little fortune. I wish I’d had a chance like it in my young time.”
He sat shaking his ‘ead to think wot he’d lost, and Charlie Tagg sat staring at ‘im and wondering wot he was to do.
“My idea is for Charlie to go for a few more v’y’ges arter they’re married while Emma works up the business,” ses Mrs. Cook; “she’ll be all right with young Bill and Sarah Ann to ‘elp her and keep ‘er company while he’s away.”
“We’ll see as she ain’t lonely,” ses George Smith, turning to Charlie.
Charlie Tagg gave a bit of a cough and said it wanted considering. He said it was no good doing things in a ‘urry and then repenting of ’em all the rest of your life. And ‘e said he’d been given to understand that chandlery wasn’t wot it ‘ad been, and some of the cleverest people ‘e knew thought that it would be worse before it was better. By the time he’d finished they was all looking at ‘im as though they couldn’t believe their ears.
“You just step round and ‘ave a look at the place,” ses old Cook; “if that don’t make you alter your tune, call me a sinner.”
Charlie Tagg felt as though ‘e could ha’ called ‘im a lot o’ worse things than that, but he took up ‘is hat and Mrs. Cook and Emma got their bonnets on and they went round.
“I don’t think much of it for eighty pounds,” ses Charlie, beginning his artfulness as they came near a big shop, with plate-glass and a double front.
“Eh?” ses old Cook, staring at ‘im. “Why, that ain’t the place. Why, you wouldn’t get that for eight ‘undred.”
“Well, I don’t think much of it,” ses Charlie; “if it’s worse than that I can’t look at it–I can’t, indeed.”
“You ain’t been drinking, Charlie?” ses old Cook, in a puzzled voice.
“Certainly not,” ses Charlie.
He was pleased to see ‘ow anxious they all looked, and when they did come to the shop ‘e set up a laugh that old Cook said chilled the marrer in ‘is bones. He stood looking in a ‘elpless sort o’ way at his wife and Emma, and then at last he ses, “There it is; and a fair bargain at the price.”
“I s’pose you ain’t been drinking?” ses Charlie.
“Wot’s the matter with it?” ses Mrs. Cook flaring up.
“Come inside and look at it,” ses Emma, taking ‘old of his arm.
“Not me,” ses Charlie, hanging back. “Why, I wouldn’t take it at a gift.”
He stood there on the kerbstone, and all they could do ‘e wouldn’t budge. He said it was a bad road and a little shop, and ‘ad got a look about it he didn’t like. They walked back ‘ome like a funeral procession, and Emma ‘ad to keep saying “H’s!” in w’ispers to ‘er mother all the way.