PAGE 2
The Head of the Family
by
Fedya tilts his chin up, cranes his neck, and fancies that he is holding himself better. Tears come into his eyes.
“Eat your dinner! Hold your spoon properly! You wait. I’ll show you, you horrid boy! Don’t dare to whimper! Look straight at me!”
Fedya tries to look straight at him, but his face is quivering and his eyes fill with tears.
“A-ah! . . . you cry? You are naughty and then you cry? Go and stand in the corner, you beast!”
“But . . . let him have his dinner first,” his wife intervenes.
“No dinner for him! Such bla . . . such rascals don’t deserve dinner!”
Fedya, wincing and quivering all over, creeps down from his chair and goes into the corner.
“You won’t get off with that!” his parent persists. “If nobody else cares to look after your bringing up, so be it; I must begin. . . . I won’t let you be naughty and cry at dinner, my lad! Idiot! You must do your duty! Do you understand? Do your duty! Your father works and you must work, too! No one must eat the bread of idleness! You must be a man! A m-man!”
“For God’s sake, leave off,” says his wife in French. “Don’t nag at us before outsiders, at least. . . . The old woman is all ears; and now, thanks to her, all the town will hear of it.”
“I am not afraid of outsiders,” answers Zhilin in Russian. “Anfissa Ivanovna sees that I am speaking the truth. Why, do you think I ought to be pleased with the boy? Do you know what he costs me? Do you know, you nasty boy, what you cost me? Or do you imagine that I coin money, that I get it for nothing? Don’t howl! Hold your tongue! Do you hear what I say? Do you want me to whip you, you young ruffian?”
Fedya wails aloud and begins to sob.
“This is insufferable,” says his mother, getting up from the table and flinging down her dinner-napkin. “You never let us have dinner in peace! Your bread sticks in my throat.”
And putting her handkerchief to her eyes, she walks out of the dining-room.
“Now she is offended,” grumbles Zhilin, with a forced smile. “She’s been spoilt. . . . That’s how it is, Anfissa Ivanovna; no one likes to hear the truth nowadays. . . . It’s all my fault, it seems.”
Several minutes of silence follow. Zhilin looks round at the plates, and noticing that no one has yet touched their soup, heaves a deep sigh, and stares at the flushed and uneasy face of the governess.
“Why don’t you eat, Varvara Vassilyevna?” he asks. “Offended, I suppose? I see. . . . You don’t like to be told the truth. You must forgive me, it’s my nature; I can’t be a hypocrite. . . . I always blurt out the plain truth” (a sigh). “But I notice that my presence is unwelcome. No one can eat or talk while I am here. . . . Well, you should have told me, and I would have gone away. . . . I will go.”
Zhilin gets up and walks with dignity to the door. As he passes the weeping Fedya he stops.
“After all that has passed here, you are free,” he says to Fedya, throwing back his head with dignity. “I won’t meddle in your bringing up again. I wash my hands of it! I humbly apologise that as a father, from a sincere desire for your welfare, I have disturbed you and your mentors. At the same time, once for all I disclaim all responsibility for your future. . . .”
Fedya wails and sobs more loudly than ever. Zhilin turns with dignity to the door and departs to his bedroom.
When he wakes from his after-dinner nap he begins to feel the stings of conscience. He is ashamed to face his wife, his son, Anfissa Ivanovna, and even feels very wretched when he recalls the scene at dinner, but his amour-propre is too much for him; he has not the manliness to be frank, and he goes on sulking and grumbling.
Waking up next morning, he feels in excellent spirits, and whistles gaily as he washes. Going into the dining-room to breakfast, he finds there Fedya, who, at the sight of his father, gets up and looks at him helplessly.
“Well, young man?” Zhilin greets him good-humouredly, sitting down to the table. “What have you got to tell me, young man? Are you all right? Well, come, chubby; give your father a kiss.”
With a pale, grave face Fedya goes up to his father and touches his cheek with his quivering lips, then walks away and sits down in his place without a word.