PAGE 5
The Great Panjandrum Himself
by
Then he walked to a speaking-tube and shouted:
“O Great Pan, grind ’em upward.”
All this time I could see the eyes of ladies and gentlemen looking at us through the peep-holes, and their eyes were about as big as wagon-wheels to my sight. I felt mean to be stared at by such gigantic goggle-eyed creatures.
The Panjandrum did not start the wheels at once because he was looking around for his little round button-at-the-top without which he cannot do anything. At length when the wheels were set a-going, the man in the white hat and the lady with the red parasol went up, and I was just about to climb up the pipe myself, to get out of the glare of the people’s eyes, when one of the children cried out:
“O sir! we’ll never get home. We can’t reach the tube.”
So I took hold of them one after another and pushed them up the spout until the wheels running backward caught them. Whenever a boy or girl slipped out of my hands I would soon after see two more of those hateful big eyes looking at me through the peep-holes. All the time I was afraid the Panjandrum Himself would quit turning or that his little round button-at-the-top would blow off before I could get out. And just as I thrust the last boy up the spout the wheels began to slacken.
“Quick,” cried the Garuly, “the Great Pan has let go of the machine. Your last chance for to-day is to get through on the headway.”
I climbed in, immediately, but I could feel the works gradually stopping. Slowly my head and my body came out at the top, but the wheels stopped stock-still before my left foot could be drawn out. It was only by slipping my foot out of my boot that I escaped.
Just as I got out there came along the Pickaninny that had gone over on the rainbow. He had come back some other way known to Pickaninnies and had in his arms a pot just like the one we had seen. But this one was full, and he set it down for us to look at. There were doubloons of Spain, there were pistoles, guineas, Arabian pieces, Jewish money, coins of Alexander the Great, and I know not what besides.
While we were examining these, a Garuly came in to say that the she-bear had brought the soap, and that the barber was waiting. The Great Panjandrum, in a state of flustration, hurried past us, and we, not knowing what else to do, stood looking at each other. Just then a Joblily went by with a cabbage leaf.
“What is that?” asked one of the little girls of our party.
“A cabbage leaf to make an apple pie,” he replied, without looking around.
Presently a Pickaninny came along with a small keg in his hands.
“What is that?” asked the same curious little girl.
“Gunpowder for the heels of their boots,” he answered, and went on.
And a spark of fire from one of the seventy-seven chimneys fell into the keg, and there was a frightful explosion.
But I don’t think it was the Panjandrum’s house that got blown up, but we ourselves, for we found ourselves outside in the woods going home from Shuteyetown. I for one resolved that the next time I came to the rainbow with one foot in the valley and the other in the mountain. I should climb to the upper end of it.