FullReads

“A little of both if you please, an’ I’m much obliged,” said Kitty with decided ease and grace, at which all the other Ruggleses pointed the finger of shame at her and Peter GRUNTED expressively, that their meaning might not be mistaken.

“You just stop your gruntin’, Peter Ruggles; that was all right. I wish I could git it inter your heads that it ain’t so much what yer say, as the way yer say it. Eily, you an’ Larry’s too little to train, so you just look at the rest, an’ do ‘s they do, an’ the Lord have mercy on ye an’ help ye to act decent! Now, is there anything more ye’d like to practice?”

“If yer tell me one more thing I can’t set up an’ eat,” said Peter, gloomily; “I’m so cram full o’ manners now I’m ready ter bust ‘thout no dinner at all.”

“Me too,” chimed in Cornelius.

“Well, I’m sorry for yer both,” rejoined Mrs. Ruggles, sarcastically; “if the ‘mount o’ manners yer’ve got on hand now, troubles ye, you’re dreadful easy hurt! Now, Sarah Maud, after dinner, about once in so often, you must say, ‘I guess we’d better be goin’;’ an’ if they say, ‘Oh, no, set a while longer,’ yer can stay; but if they don’t say nothin’ you’ve got ter get up an’ go. Can you remember?”

“ABOUT ONCE IN SO OFTEN!” Could any words in the language be fraught with more terrible and wearing uncertainty?

“Well,” answered Sarah Maud, mournfully, “seems as if this whole dinner party set right square on top o’ me! Maybe I could manage my own manners, but ter manage nine mannerses is worse ‘n staying to home!”

“Oh, don’t fret,” said her mother, good naturedly, “I guess you’ll git along. I wouldn’t mind if folks would only say, ‘Oh, childern will be childern;’ but they won’t. They’ll say, ‘Land o’ Goodness, who fetched them childern up?’ Now it’s quarter past five; you can go, an’ whatever yer do, don’t forget your mother was a McGrill!”

VI.

“WHEN THE PIE WAS OPENED, THE BIRDS BEGAN TO SING!”

The children went out the back door quietly, and were presently lost to sight, Sarah Maud slipping and stumbling along absent-mindedly as she recited, under her breath,

“It–was–such–a–pleasant–evenin’–an–sech–a–short –walk–we–thought–we’d–leave–our–hats–to–home.”

Peter rang the door bell, and presently a servant admitted them, and, whispering something in Sarah’s ear, drew her downstairs into the kitchen. The other Ruggleses stood in horror-stricken groups as the door closed behind their commanding officer; but there was no time for reflection, for a voice from above was heard, saying, “Come right up stairs, please!”

“Theirs not to make reply,
Theirs not to reason why,
Theirs but to do or die.”

Accordingly, they walked upstairs, and Elfrida, the nurse, ushered them into a room more splendid than anything they had ever seen. But, oh woe! where was Sarah Maud! and was it Fate that Mrs. Bird should say, at once, “Did you lay your hats in the hall?” Peter felt himself elected by circumstance the head of the family, and, casting one imploring look at tongue-tied Susan, standing next him, said huskily, “It was so very pleasant–that–that” “That we hadn’t good hats enough to go round,” put in little Susan, bravely, to help him out, and then froze with horror that the ill-fated words had slipped off her tongue.

However, Mrs. Bird said, pleasantly, “Of course you wouldn’t wear hats such a short distance–I forgot when I asked. Now, will you come right in to Miss Carol’s room, she is so anxious to see you?”

Just then Sarah Maud came up the back-stairs, so radiant with joy from her secret interview with the cook, that Peter could have pinched her with a clear conscience, and Carol gave them a joyful welcome. “But where is Baby Larry?” she cried, looking over the group with searching eye. “Didn’t he come?”

“Larry! Larry!” Good Gracious, where was Larry? They were all sure that he had come in with them, for Susan remembered scolding him for tripping over the door-mat. Uncle Jack went into convulsions of laughter. “Are you sure there were nine of you?” he asked, merrily.