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Alf Reesling’s voice was heard in plaintive protest. He spoke to his elbow neighbour, but in a tone audible to every one, far and near.

“I’ll be dog-goned if I’ll stand for that. It’s an insult to every man here to say they are of the same sex. We give ’em the vote and, by gosh, they claim our sex. I–“

“Order!” commanded Marshal Crow.

The orator resumed. “It is my privilege to present for your consideration the name of one of our most illustrious citizens for the honourable office of Town Marshal. A name that is a household word, second only to that of the present incumbent. Circumstances over which we have no control–although we did have it up to a short time ago–make it possible for me to present to you a name that will go down in history as one of the grandest since the bonny days of good Queen Bess. Gentlemen–and at the same time, ladies–I have the honour to put in nomination for Town Marshal our distinguished fellow voter, Mrs. Anderson Crow!”

A silence even more potential than the one preceding Mr. Squire’s peroration ensued. It was broken this time by Uncle Dad Simms, who proceeded to further glorify his deafness by squeaking:

“And he’ll be elected, too, you bet your boots. We don’t want no gosh-blamed woman fer–eh? What say, Alf?” And Alf, making a cup of his hands, repeated with great vigour an inch or so from Uncle Dad’s ear the timely remark that had caused the ancient to hesitate. It is not necessary to quote Alf, but Uncle Dad’s rejoinder is important.

“Well, Jee-hosaphat!” he gasped.

“Is there a second to the nomination?” inquired the chairman.

Marshal Crow arose. “I second the nomination,” he said, taking a sudden tug at his whiskers. “Before we take a ballot, Mr. Chairman, I want to say right here an’ now that Mrs. Crow will have my full an’ undivided support, just as she has always had. I have allus maintained that a woman’s place is in the home. Therefore, when it comes time fer Mrs. Crow to assume the responsibilities of this here office, I am goin’ to see to it that she stays home an’ tends to her household duties. I am goin’ to be deputy marshal durin’ her term of office, without pay, ladies an’ gentlemen, an’ I am goin’ to lift every bit o’ the work off’n her shoulders. I believe in equal sufferin’. If she’ll do the woman’s share o’ the work, I’ll do the man’s, an’ nothin’ could be fairer than that. Between us we’ll give the city o’ Tinkletown the best administration the office of marshal has ever had. My wife ain’t here tonight to accept the honour you are goin’ to heap on her, but I think I can safely promise she’ll consent to make the race. She may kick like a bay steer at first, but when she sees it’s her duty to run, you bet she’ll do it! It’s a case of woman ag’in woman, feller Republicans, an’ man ag’in man. All I got to say is that the best woman’s bound to win. I almost forgot to say that if the voters o’ Tinkletown don’t jump at the chance to git a marshal an’ a experienced deputy for the price o’ one salary, it’s because there’s more derned fools in the town than I thought there was.”

Mr. Ed Higgins sprang to his feet.

“I move, Mr. Chairman, that we make the nomination unanimous without a dissenting vote,” he cried out. “We got a chance to get the best deputy marshal in the United States of America without it costin’ us a red cent, an’ besides that, we get the best cook in all Tinkletown for marshal. If there’s anybody here, male or female, who c’n deny that Mrs. Crow is the best cook alive I’d like to hear him say so. I’ve eat a hundred meals in her house an’ I know what I’m talkin’ about. I defy anybody–“