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Sharon’s Choice
by
“Then I should have thought Leola–” I began.
“Not the sex of the speaker. It’s the listeners. Now you take women. Women generally prefer something that will give them a good cry. We men want to laugh mostly.”
“Yes,” said I; “I would rather laugh myself, I think.”
“You’d know you’d rather if you had to live in Sharon. The laugh is one of the big differences between women and men, and I would give you my views about it, only my Sunday-off time is up, and I’ve got to go to telegraphing.”
“Our ways are together,” said I. “I’m going back to the railroad hotel.”
“There’s Guy,” continued Stuart. “He took the prize on ‘The Jumping Frog.’ Spoke better than Leola, anyhow. She spoke ‘The Wreck of the Hesperus.’ But Guy had the back benches–that’s where the men sit– pretty well useless. Guess if there had been a fire, some of the fellows would have been scorched before they’d have got strength sufficient to run out. But the ladies did not laugh much. Said they saw nothing much in jumping a frog. And if Leola had made ’em cry good and hard that night, the committee’s decision would have kicked up more of a fuss than it did. As it was, Mrs. Mattern got me alone; but I worked us around to where Mrs. Jeffries was having her ice-cream, and I left them to argue it out.”
“Let us adhere to that policy,” I said to Stuart; and he replied nothing, but into the corner of his eye wandered that lurking smile which revealed that life brought him compensations.
He went to telegraphing, and I to revery concerning strawberry night. I found myself wishing now that there could have been two prizes; I desired both Leola and Guy to be happy; and presently I found the matter would be very close, so far at least as my judgment went. For boy and girl both brought me their selections, begging I would coach them, and this I had plenty of leisure to do. I preferred Guy’s choice–the story of that blue-jay who dropped nuts through the hole in a roof, expecting to fill it, and his friends came to look on and discovered the hole went into the entire house. It is better even than “The Jumping Frog”–better than anything, I think–and young Guy told it well. But Leola brought a potent rival on the tearful side of things. “The Death of Paul Dombey” is plated pathos, not wholly sterling; but Sharon could not know this; and while Leola most prettily recited it to me I would lose my recent opinion in favor of Guy, and acknowledge the value of her performance. Guy might have the men strong for him, but this time the women were going to cry. I got also a certain other sort of entertainment out of the competing mothers. Mrs. Jeffries and Mrs. Mattern had a way of being in the hotel office at hours when I passed through to meals. They never came together, and always were taken by surprise at meeting me.
“Leola is ever so grateful to you,” Mrs. Mattern would say.
“Oh,” I would answer, “do not speak of it. Have you ever heard Guy’s ‘Blue-Jay’ story?”
“Well, if it’s anything like that frog business, I don’t want to.” And the lady would leave me.
“Guy tells me you are helping him so kindly,” said Mrs. Jeffries.
“Oh yes, I’m severe,”‘ I answered, brightly. “I let nothing pass. I only wish I was as careful with Leola. But as soon as she begins ‘Paul had never risen from his little bed,’ I just lose myself listening to her.”
On the whole, there were also compensations for me in these mothers, and I thought it as well to secure them in advance.
When the train arrived from El Paso, and I saw our strawberries and our ice-cream taken out, I felt the hour to be at hand, and that whatever our decision, no bias could be laid to me. According to his prudent habit, Eastman had the speakers follow each other alphabetically. This happened to place Leola after Guy, and perhaps might give her the last word, as it were, with the people; but our committee was there, and superior to such accidents. The flags and the bunting hung gay around the draped stage. While the audience rustled or resoundingly trod to its chairs, and seated neighbors conferred solemnly together over the programme, Stuart, behind the bunting, played “Silver Threads among the Gold” upon a melodeon.