FullReads

“The Colonel did not realise the magnitude of his disaster until two or three weeks later, when he happened to be waiting for a train at St. Boswells Station. The porter came to him and said:

“‘Hae ye ony mind, Colonel, o’ yon big fush ye slippit in the Tod Holes yon nicht?’

“‘Oh, I mind him well,’ replied the Colonel; ‘a good lump of a fish he was, I believe, but I never saw him rightly.’

“‘Ay,’ said the other dryly; ‘yon wad be the biggest sawmon that ever cam oot o’ the water o’ Tweed, I’m thinking.’

“‘Why, what do you know about him?’ asked the Colonel.

“‘Oh, I ken fine aboot the ae half o’ him, ony way,’ replied the porter. ‘Ye see, there was twa lads clappit amang the trees below the Wallace statue forenenst ye, waiting till it was dark to set a cairn net, ye ken. Weel, didna they see you coming doun the water taigled wi’ a fish? And when ye cam to the Tod Holes, they saw ye loss him, and they got a visee o’ the water he made coming into the east bank, ye ken. There’s a wee bit cairn there, ye ken, wi’ a piece lound water ahint it, where they jaloused the fish wad rest himsel a wee. Weel, they waited till it was mirk night, and then they jist whuppit the net round him, and they sune had him oot. He was that big he wadna gang into the bag they had wi’ them; so they cuttit him in twa halves; and the tae half they brocht to the station here to gang by rail to Embro’. Weel, if the tither half was as big, yon fish bud to be seeventy pund weight; for the half o’ him I weighed mysel, and it was better nor thirty-five pund. Ay, a gran’ kipper!'”

Yet occasionally, in olden days, a salmon big as Tam Purdie’s muckle kipper was got by rod and line. In 1815 Rob Kerss, the famous “Rob o’ the Trows,” hooked a leviathan in Makerstoun Water–the biggest fish, he said, that ever he saw; so big that it took even so great a master as Rob hours to land, and left him “clean dune oot.” At last the fish lay, a magnificent monster, stretched on the shingle. With aching arms but thankful heart, Rob moved away a trifle to lift a stone wherewith to smite his captive over the head. And with that, Rob’s back being partly turned, from the tail of his eye he saw the salmon give a wammle. In novels, it is usually “but the work of a moment” for the hero to turn and perform some noted feat. Here, alas! it was different. It was but the work of a moment, certainly, for Rob to turn, and to jump on the huge salmon. But there all resemblance to the typical hero ceased, for the line fouled his foot, and broke as it tripped him up; and before the fisherman knew where he was, he and the salmon were struggling together in deep water. It was only Rob that came out. Sic transit. Trust not a fish till the bag closes on him.