**** ROTATE **** **** ROTATE **** **** ROTATE **** **** ROTATE ****

Find this Story

Print, a form you can hold

Wireless download to your Amazon Kindle

Look for a summary or analysis of this Story.

Enjoy this? Share it!

PAGE 3

Reluctance
by [?]

“What nonsense! Why, I could see to read!”

“But I’m sure you’re tired.”

“How absurd you are! Was it a great bore?”

“What?”

“Why, coming.”

“No,” said Harry.

In such affairs monosyllables are danger signals. A long protestation might have meant nothing: in this short, sufficient negative Mrs. Mortimer recognized the boy’s sincerity. A little thrill of pride and shame, and perhaps something else, ran through her. The night was hot and she unfastened the clasp of her cloak, breathing a trifle quickly. To relieve the silence, she said, with a laugh:

“You see we poor married women have to depend on charity. Our husbands don’t care to walk home with us. Your father was bent on your coming.”

Harry laughed a short laugh; the utter darkness of Mr. Sterling’s condition struck through his agitation down to his sense of humor. Mrs. Mortimer smiled at him; she could not help it: the secret between them was so pleasant to her, even while she hated herself for its existence.

They had reached the meadow now, halfway through their journey. A little gate led into it and Harry stopped, leaning his arm on the top rail.

“Oh, no! we must go on,” she murmured.

“They won’t move for an hour yet,” he answered, and then he suddenly broke out:

“How–how funny it is! I hardly remembered you, you know.”

“Oh, but I remembered you, a pretty little boy;” and she looked up at his face, half a foot above her. Mere stature has much effect and the little boy stage seemed very far away. And he knew that it did, for he put out his hand to take hers. She drew back.

“No,” she said.

Harry blushed. She took hold of the gate and he, yielding his place, let her pass through. For a minute or two they walked on in silence.

“Oh, how silly you are!” she cried then, beginning with a laugh and ending with a strange catch in her throat. “Why, you’re only just out of knickerbockers!”

“I don’t care, I don’t care, Hilda—-“

“Hush, hush! Oh, indeed, you must be quiet! See, we are nearly home.”

He seized her hand, not to be quelled this time, and, bending low over it, kissed it. She did not draw it away, but watched him with a curious, pained smile. He looked up in her face, his own glowing with excitement. He righted himself to his full stature and, from that stooping, kissed her on the lips.

“Oh, you silly boy!” she moaned, and found herself alone in the meadow. He had gone swiftly back by the way they had come, and she went on to her home.

“Well, the boy saw you home?” asked Mr. Mortimer when he arrived half an hour later.

“Yes,” she said, raising her head from the cushions of the sofa on which he found her lying.

“I supposed so, but he didn’t come into the smoking-room when he got back. Went straight to bed, I expect. He’s a nice-mannered young fellow, isn’t he?”

“Oh, very!” said Mrs. Mortimer.

II.

Mr. Mortimer had never been so looked after, cosseted, and comforted for his early start as the next morning, nor the children found their mother so patient and affectionate. She was in an abasement of shame and disgust at herself, and quite unable to treat her transgression lightly. That he was a boy and she–not a girl–seemed to charge her with his as well as her own sins, and, besides this moral aggravation, entailed a lower anxiety as to his discretion and secrecy that drove her half mad with worry. Suppose he should boast of it! Or, if he were not bad enough for that, only suppose he should be carried away into carelessness about it! He had nothing to fear worse than what he would call “a wigging” and perhaps summary dismissal to a tutor’s: she had more at risk than she could bear to think of. Probably, by now, he recognized his foolishness, and laughed at himself and her. This thought made her no happier, for men may do all that–and yet, very often, they do not stop.