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The talk drifted from one thing to another, and finally one of our party told Mark Twain’s yarn about “the meanest man on earth.” Our host listened at the kitchen door, a streak of flour shining white athwart the cataract of his auburn beard, and testified his amusement by a delighted roar that was like unto the rejoicings of a bull of Bashan.

“Posey,” he exclaimed, “tell ’em about that stingy friend o’ yours!”

Posey chuckled and pushed his old slouch hat to the back of his head.

“Well,” he said, “I reckon that feller was jest about as stingy as the feller you ‘ve been tellin’ about, and mebby stingier, ’cause he ‘d take more risks. Anyway, he was as ornery stingy as he could be an’ live. If he ‘d been any wuss he ‘d of died to save grub an’ shoe leather. W’y, him and me was out huntin’ together oncet, over toward Mono. But I oughter tell you fust it was a long time ago, ‘way back in the days when everybody had to carry powder-flasks, an’ each of us had one on a string ’round his neck.

“Well, ‘long about noon we come to a clear, purty little lake and set down to eat a snack. I was stoopin’ over the edge of the lake to get some water in my hat an’ my powder-flask slipped off an’ went, kersplash, down to the bottom! The water was so clear I could see it layin’ down there, as plain as could be, fifty feet down, I reckon, fer them mountain lakes is prodeejus deep. Well, the other feller, he could dive better ‘n I could–he was a great one fer divin’–an’ he said he ‘d go down after it. So he stripped, but kep’ his powder-flask ’round his neck. That kinder riled me, fer it looked as if he was afeared I ‘d run off with it while he was gone. I did n’t say nothin’, though, an’ down he went.

“Well, I set there an’ waited, an’ finished eatin’ my snack, an’ waited an’ waited for him to come up agin. I reckon I must a’ set there about fifteen minutes, anyhow, and at last I begun to git so curious about what he could be doin’ all that time, that I up an’ went over to the edge of the bank an’ peeked down into the water. An’ consarn my soul!”–here Posey bristled up with as much excited interest in voice and manner as if he were at that moment peering down into the depths of the lake–“What do you s’pose he was a-doin’ down there?”

“Drowning?” suggested one of our party in a tone that Posey must have thought too flippant for the occasion, for he turned upon the speaker with an indignation that could not all have been inspired by the memory of his stingy friend’s deed.

“Drownin’! Him! An’ leave his duds up on the ground fer somebody else to git the good of? Huh! Not much! No, sir! There he was, down there at the bottom of the lake–an’ I ‘m a-tellin’ you the Gospel truth, an’ you may take me out an’ drown me in that there very lake if I ain’t–there was that ornery, stingy cuss down there takin’ his time to empty the powder out o’ my flask into his’n! I was so mad I felt like heavin’ a rock down on ‘im!”

Like many a man in far less humble station, Posey has but to repeat an idea or a statement a few times to convince himself of its absolute truth, no matter how reckless may have been its first enunciation. As we talked, the sound and savor of frying venison came appetizingly from the kitchen. Posey sniffed it and straightened up, with childlike, pleased expectancy.

“Venison ‘s a mighty healthy meat, ain’t it, Doc?” he said, addressing a physician who was with us. The doctor gave assent, and Posey swelled and beamed with pleasure that his opinion had won scientific approval.

“Yes, sir,” he went on enthusiastically, “it’s the healthiest meat there is! Wy, if a man would jest eat venison all the time, he ‘d never be sick, an’–an’ he’d never die, neither!” He paused a moment, the least mite taken aback by the sweepingness of his proposition, then glanced belligerently around his little circle of listeners and repeated with emphasis: “No, sir! he’d never die!” He stopped again, but this time with triumph shining in his face, as who would say. Dispute it if you dare! Evidently he was quite convinced by that time of the truth of his statement, but still felt the need of making his hearers believe. He brought his fist down upon the table with a blow that made the dishes Win Davis was placing thereon jump and rattle, and exclaimed in tones of the most serious and heartfelt conviction:

“No, sir! He’d live forever, he would! He ‘d never, never die!”