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On Picket Duty
by
“Show us her picture; I know you’ve got one; all the fellows have, though half of ’em won’t own up.”
“I’ve only got part of one. I once saved my little girl, and her picture once saved me.”
From an inner pocket Thorn produced a woman’s housewife, carefully untied it, though all its implements were missing but a little thimble, and from one of its compartments took a flattened bullet and the remnants of a picture.
“I gave her that the first Christmas after I found her. She wasn’t as tidy about her clothes as I liked to see, and I thought if I gave her a handy thing like this, she’d be willing to sew. But she only made one shirt for me, and then got tired, so I keep it like an old fool, as I am. Yes, that’s the bit of lead that would have done for me, if Mary’s likeness hadn’t been just where it was.”
“You’ll like to show her this when you go home, won’t you?” said Dick, as he took up the bullet, while Phil examined the marred picture, and Thorn poised the little thimble on his big finger, with a sigh.
“How can I, when I don’t know where she is, and camp is all the home I’ve got!”
The words broke from him like a sudden groan, when some old wound is rudely touched. Both of the young men started, both laid back the relics they had taken up, and turned their eyes from Thorn’s face, across which swept a look of shame and sorrow, too significant to be misunderstood. Their silence assured him of their sympathy, and, as if that touch of friendliness unlocked his heavy heart, he eased it by a full confession. When he spoke again, it was with the calmness of repressed emotion, a calmness more touching to his mates than the most passionate outbreak, the most pathetic lamentation; for the coarse camp-phrases seemed to drop from his vocabulary; more than once his softened voice grew tremulous, and to the words “my little girl,” there went a tenderness that proved how dear a place she still retained in that deep heart of his.
“Boys, I’ve gone so far; I may as well finish; and you’ll see I’m not without some cause for my stern looks and ways; you’ll pity me, and from you I’ll take the comfort of it. It’s only the old story,–I married her, worked for her, lived for her, and kept my little girl like a lady. I should have known that I was too old and sober for a young thing like that, for the life she led before the pinch came just suited her. She liked to be admired, to dress and dance and make herself pretty for all the world to see; not to keep house for a quiet man like me. Idleness wasn’t good for her, it bred discontent; then some of her old friends, who’d left her in her trouble, found her out when better times came round, and tried to get her back again. I was away all day, I didn’t know how things were going, and she wasn’t open with me, afraid she said; I was so grave, and hated theatres so. She got courage finally to tell me that she wasn’t happy; that she wanted to dance again, and asked me if she mightn’t. I’d rather have had her ask me to put her in a fire, for I did hate theatres, and was bred to; others think they’re no harm. I do; and knew it was a bad life for a girl like mine. It pampers vanity, and vanity is the Devil’s help with such; so I said No, kindly at first, sharp and stern when she kept on teasing. That roused her spirit. ‘I will go!’ she said, one day. ‘Not while you are my wife,’ I answered back; and neither said any more, but she gave me a look I didn’t think she could, and I resolved to take her away from temptation before worse came of it.