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Now, then, when all his plans for meeting the exigencies of his case had turned out abortive, suddenly a bold idea struck him. In a sort of inspiration he seized a pair of scissors, for the purpose of converting with his own untutored hand of genius his pea-green surtout into a pea-green frock. This operation having, in his own judgment, succeeded to a marvel, he no longer hesitated to cut out a pair of ball shoes from his neat’s-leather ‘field-pieces.’ Whatever equipments were still wanting could be had for money, with the exception of a shirt; and, as to that, the wedding shirt of the late Mr. Sweetbread would answer the purpose very passably.

What provoked our hero most of all were the new patent shoe-buckles, the fine points of which would not take firm hold of the coarse leather shoes, but on every bold step burst asunder–so that he was obliged to keep his eye warily upon them, and in consideration of their tender condition, to set his feet down to the ground very gently.

The hostess had just sunk pretty deep into her customary failing of intoxication, when he went to her and asked how he looked in his gala dress.

‘Look!’ said she; ‘why, like a king baked in gingerbread. Ah! now, such a man as you is the man for my money:–stout, and resolute, and active, and a man that—-‘

‘Basta! sufficit, my dear.’

‘To be sure, for his professional merit, I mustn’t say anything against the late Mr. Sweetbread: No, nobody must say anything against that: he was the man for slaughtering of swine; Oh! he slaughtered them, that it was beautiful to see! pigs in particular, and pigs in general, were what he understood. Ah! lord! to my dying day I shall never forget the great sow that he presented to our gracious princess when she was at the baths, two years come Michaelmas. Says her Highness to him, says she,–“Master,” says she, “one may see by your look that you understand how to fatten: anybody,” says she, “may see it in his face: a child may see it by the very look on him. Ah!” says her Highness, “he’s the man for swine: he was born to converse with hogs: he’s a heaven-born curer of bacon.”–Lord! Mr. Schnackenberger, you’ll not believe how these gracious words revived my very heart! The tears came into my eyes, and I couldn’t speak for joy. But, when all’s said and done, what’s fame? what’s glory? say I. A man like you is the man for me: but for such another lazy old night-cap as the late Mr. Sweetbread—-‘

‘Bah! sufficit, sweetheart;’ at the same time squeezing her hand, which she took as an intimation that she ought not to trouble herself with the past, but rather look forward to a joyous futurity.

As the hour drew near for presenting himself in the circle of the princess, Mr. Jeremiah recommended to her the most vigilant care of Juno, from whom he very unwillingly separated himself in these last days of their connection–and not until he had satisfied himself that it was absolutely impossible to take her with him to the ball. Another favourite, namely, his pipe, ought also, he feared, in strict propriety to be left behind. But in the first place, ‘who knows,’ thought he, ‘but there may be one room reserved for such ladies and gentlemen as choose to smoke?’ And, secondly, let that be as it might, he considered that the great meerschaum[22] head of his pipe–over which he watched as over the apple of his eye–could nowhere be so safely preserved as in his own pocket: as to any protuberance that it might occasion, that he valued not at a rush. Just as little did he care for the grotesque appearance of the mouth-piece, which in true journeyman’s fashion stuck out from the opening of his capacious pocket to a considerable distance.