FullReads

But there was something in the man himself which attracted attention, and made one think of him in his absence.

I mean by this, that there was a spirit of resistance to his destiny in him, which is very rarely found in serving-men of his order. I remember accompanying the General “on one of his periodical visits of inspection to the stable.” He was so well satisfied that he proposed extending his investigations to the groom’s own room.

“If you don object, Michael?” he added, with his customary consideration for the self-respect of all persons in his employment. Michael’s color rose a little; he looked at me. “I am afraid the young lady will not find my room quite so tidy as it ought to be,” he said as he opened the door for us.

The only disorder in the groom’s room was produced, to our surprise, by the groom’s books and papers.

Cheap editions of the English poets, translations of Latin and Greek classics, handbooks for teaching French and German “without a master,” carefully written “exercises” in both languages, manuals of shorthand, with more “exercises” in that art, were scattered over the table, round the central object of a reading-lamp, which spoke plainly of studies by night. “Why, what is all this?” cried the General. “Are you going to leave me, Michael, and set up a school?” Michael answered in sad, submissive tones. “I try to improve myself, sir–though I sometimes lose heart and hope.” “Hope of what?” asked my uncle. “Are you not content to be a servant? Must you rise in the world, as the saying is?” The groom shrank a little at that abrupt question. “If I had relations to care for me and help me along the hard ways of life,” he said, “I might be satisfied, sir, to remain as I am. As it is, I have no one to think about but myself–and I am foolish enough sometimes to look beyond myself.”

So far, I had kept silence; but I could no longer resist giving him a word of encouragement–his confession was so sadly and so patiently made. “You speak too harshly of yourself,” I said; “the best and greatest men have begun like you by looking beyond themselves.” For a moment our eyes met. I admired the poor lonely fellow trying so modestly and so bravely to teach himself–and I did not care to conceal it. He was the first to look away; some suppressed emotion turned him deadly pale. Was I the cause of it? I felt myself tremble as that bold question came into my mind. The General, with one sharp glance at me, diverted the talk (not very delicately, as I thought) to the misfortune of Michael’s birth.

“I have heard of your being deserted in your infancy by some woman unknown,” he said. “What has become of the things you were wrapped in, and the letter that was found on you? They might lead to a discovery, one of these days.” The groom smiled. “The last master I served thought of it as you do, Sir. He was so good as to write to the gentleman who was first burdened with the care of me–and the things were sent to me in return.”

He took up an unlocked leather bag, which opened by touching a brass knob, and showed us the shawl, the linen (sadly faded by time) and the letter. We were puzzled by the shawl. My uncle, who had served in the East, thought it looked like a very rare kind of Persian work. We examined with interest the letter, and the fine linen. When Michael quietly remarked, as we handed them back to him, “They keep the secret, you see,” we could only look at each other, and own there was nothing more to be said.

VII.

THAT night, lying awake thinking, I made my first discovery of a great change that had come over me. I felt like a new woman.