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Lords Of The Pots And Pans
by
“Now, Mr. Happy,” he would smile, “I am agreeable to place the confidence in your so gracious person that you prepare the potatoes, yes? And that you attend to the boiling of meat and the unpacking and arrangement of those necessary furnishings for fich you possess the great understanding. And I shall prepare the so delicious dessert of the floating island, what you call in America. Yes? Our friends will have the so delightful astonishment when they arrive. They shall exclaim and partake joyously, is it not? And for your reward, Mr. Happy, I shall be so pleased to set aside a very extensive portion of the delicious floating island, so that you can eat no more except you endanger your handsome person from the bursting. Yes?” And oh, the smile of him!
A man of sterner stuff than Happy Jack would have fallen before such guile and would have labored willingly–nay, gladly in the service of so delightful a diplomat as Jakie. Except for that willing service, Jakie would have been quite overwhelmed by the many and peculiar duties of a roundup cook. He would have been perfectly helpess before the morning and noon packing of dishes and food, and the skilful haste necessary to unpack and prepare a meal for fifteen ravenous appetites within the time limit would have been utterly impossible. Jakie was a chef, trained to his profession in well-appointed kitchens and with assistance always at hand; which is a trade apart from cooking for a roundup crew.
Happy Jack, in the fulness of time, returned with the eggs. That is, he returned with six eggs and a quart or two of a yellowish mixture thickly powdered with shell. He took the pail to Jakie and he saw the seraphic smile fade from his face and an unpleasant glitter creep into his eyes.
“It is the omelet fich you furnish, yes? The six eggs, they will not make the pudding. The omelet–I do not perceive yet the desirableness of the omelet. And the juvenile hen–yes?”
“Aw, they wouldn’t sell no chickens.” Happy Jack’s face had gone long and scarlet before the patent displeasure of the other. “And my horse was scared uh the bucket and pitched with me.”
Jackie looked again into the pail, felt gingerly the yellow mess and discovered one more egg which retained some semblance of its original form. “The misfortune distresses me,” he murmured. “It is that you return hastily, Mr. Happy, and procure other eggs fich you will place unbroken in my waiting hands, yes?”
Happy Jack mopped his forehead and glanced at the sun, burning hotly down upon the prairie. They had made a short move that day and it was still early. But the way to Nelson’s and back had been hot and tumultuous and he was tired. For the first time since his abject surrender to the waxed smile, Happy Jack chafed a bit under the yoke of voluntary servitude. “Aw, can’t yuh cook something that don’t take so many eggs?” he asked in something like his old, argumentative tone.
The unpleasant glitter in the eyes of Jakie grew more pronounced; grew even snaky, in the opinion of Happy Jack. “It is that I am no more permitted the privilege of preparing the food for fich I have the judgment, yes?” His voice purred too much to be convincing. “It is that I am no more the chef to be obeyed by my servant?”
“Aw, gwan! I ain’t anybody’s servant that I ever heard of!” Happy Jack felt himself bewilderedly slipping from his loyalty. What had come over Jakie, to act like this? He walked away to where there was some shade and sat down sullenly. Jakie’s servant, was he? Well! “The darned little greasy-faced runt,” he mumbled rebelliously, and immediately felt the better for it.
Two cigarettes brought coolness and calm. Happy Jack wanted very much to lie there and take a nap, but his conscience stirred uneasily. The boys were making a long circle that day and would come in with the appetites–and the tempers–of wolves. It occurred to Happy Jack that their appetites were much keener than they had ever been before, and he sat there a little longer while he thought about it; for Happy Jack’s mind was slow and tenacious, and he hated to leave a new idea until he had squeezed it dry of all mystery. He watched Jakie moving in desultory fashion about the tent–but most of the time Jakie stayed inside.