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“They’re trespassing,” I ses, “all except the skipper and mate here. They belong to a little wash-tub that’s laying alongside, and they’re both as ‘armless as they look.”

It’s wonderful wot a uniform will do. The policeman just jerked his ‘ead and said “out-side,” and the men went out like a flock of sheep. The on’y man that said a word was the carman, who was in such a hurry that ‘e knocked his bad shin against my foot as ‘e went by. The thin little woman was passed out by the policeman in the middle of a speech she was making, and he was just going for the other, when the skipper stopped ‘im.

“This lady is coming on my ship,” he ses, puffing out ‘is chest.

I looked at ‘im, and then I turned to the policeman. “So long as she goes off my wharf, I don’t mind where she goes,” I ses. “The skipper’s goings-on ‘ave got nothing to do with me.”

“Then she can foller him ‘ome in the morning,” ses the skipper. “Good night, watch-man.”

Him and the mate ‘elped the silly old thing to the ship, and, arter I ‘ad been round to the Bear’s Head and fetched a pint for the police-man, I locked up and sat down to think things out; and the more I thought the worse they seemed. I’ve ‘eard people say that if you have a clear conscience nothing can hurt you. They didn’t know my missus.

I got up at last and walked on to the jetty, and the woman, wot was sitting on the deck of the John Henry, kept calling out: “Bill!” like a sick baa-lamb crying for its ma. I went back, and ‘ad four pints at the Bear’s Head, but it didn’t seem to do me any good, and at last I went and sat down in the office to wait for morning.

It came at last, a lovely morning with a beautiful sunrise; and that woman sitting up wide awake, waiting to foller me ‘ome. When I opened the gate at six o’clock she was there with the mate and the skipper, waiting, and when I left at five minutes past she was trotting along beside me.

Twice I stopped and spoke to ‘er, but it was no good. Other people stopped too, and I ‘ad to move on agin; and every step was bringing me nearer to my house and the missus.

I turned into our street, arter passing it three times, and the first thing I saw was my missus standing on the doorstep ‘aving a few words with the lady next door. Then she ‘appened to look up and see us, just as that silly woman was trying to walk arm-in-arm.

Twice I knocked her ‘and away, and then, right afore my wife and the party next door, she put her arm round my waist. By the time I got to the ‘ouse my legs was trembling so I could hardly stand, and when I got into the passage I ‘ad to lean up against the wall for a bit.

“Keep ‘er out,” I ses.

“Wot do you want?” ses my missus, trembling with passion. “Wot do you think you’re doing?”

“I want my ‘usband, Bill,” ses the woman.

My missus put her ‘and to her throat and came in without a word, and the woman follered ‘er. If I hadn’t kept my presence o’ mind and shut the door two or three more would ‘ave come in too.

I went into the kitchen about ten minutes arterwards to see ‘ow they was getting on. Besides which they was both calling for me.

“Now then!” ses my missus, who was leaning up against the dresser with ‘er arms folded, “wot ‘ave you got to say for yourself walking in as bold as brass with this hussy?”

“Bill!” ses the woman, “did you hear wot she called me?”

She spoke to me like that afore my wife, and in two minutes they was at it, hammer and tongs.