PAGE 5
Canceled Orders
by
“It so happened that I had to pass through Morris’ town about ten days afterwards. I didn’t care anything about reinstating the order for the amount of it, but I really did wish to go in and see my old friend and at least square myself. So I dropped off one day between trains at Morris’ town, and went up to see him.
“‘Hello,’ said he, ‘How are you, old man? I’m glad to see you. Say, but dot vas a tandy letter. I’ve ortered a seventy-five-cent vrame for it.’
“‘Well, Morris,’ said I, ‘you know I’m really very glad that a little difficulty of this kind has come up between us as I like you to know just where I stand. Now, I haven’t come here to do anything but just see you. Cut the order clear out–I wish you would. It would teach the house a lesson and make them more careful hereafter. Come on down with me now. It’s about supper time and we’re going to have a little feed.’
“I really meant every word I said. After we had finished a fried chicken or two, we started back to Morris’ store.
“‘Say,’ said he, ‘Haf you got the copy of dot orter I gafe you?’
“I said, ‘Why no, Morris, I haven’t a copy of it. You have one. Don’t you remember that I gave you one?’
“‘Yes, but ven I didn’t get my goots on time–I kapt vaiting, und vaiting, und vaiting, und still dey ditn’t com, I took dot copy and I vas so mad dot I tore it op and trew id in der stofe.’
“‘Well, if you wish to look over the copy, Morris, I can easily run down to the depot and tear my tissue paper one out of my order book.’
“‘Vell, you go down und get it,’ said Morris. ‘Dere’s some off the Gristmas goots it is too late for me to use, but we’ll fix op de Spring shipment som vay.’
“When Morris and I looked over my copy, he cut out a few items of the December 1st shipment but added to the February 1st order a great deal more than he canceled from the other one.
“‘Say,’ said Morris, ‘do you know vy I reinsdadet dot orter. It vas dot letter you sent me.’
“‘Well, I thank you very much,’ said I.
“‘You know, I don’t care so much aboud dose “vorldly hopes” and dot “sonshine,” but vat dit strike me vas vere you saidt: “It’s better fair to bear de ilts ve half don vly to odders dot we know not of.” Dot means, Vat’s de use of chanching ‘ouses.'”
“You can handle some men like that,” said a hat man friend who sat with us, but I struck one old bluffer out in South Dakota once that wouldn’t stand for any smoothing over. He was the most disagreeable white man to do business with I ever saw. He was all right to talk fishing and politics with, and was a good entertainer. He always treated me decently in that way but when it got down to business he was the meanest son of a gun on earth. A fishing trip for half an hour or the political situation during luncheon is a pretty good thing to talk over, but when it comes to interfering with business, I think it is about time to cut it out.
“My house had been selling this man for several years. He handled a whole lot of goods but it worried the life out of me to get his bill.
“Last time I did business with him he had monkeyed with me all day long, and I had struck him as many as four times to go over to my sample room. If he had made a positive engagement and said that he would see me at twelve o’clock that night, it would have been all right; but he would turn away with a grunt the subject of going to look at samples, not even giving me the satisfaction of saying he didn’t want anything at all.