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Abner, The Jew, Who Had Seen Nothing
by
“Well, by the cities of the Prophet!” cried Muley Ismael, “I call that a pair of eyes! Such eyes would not harm you, master of the huntsmen; they would save you the expense of a pack of hounds; you, minister of the police, could see further than all your bailiffs and spies. Well, Philistine, in view of your uncommon acuteness, that has pleased us so well, we will show you clemency; the fifty lashes that you justly received are worth fifty zecchini, as they will save you fifty more; so draw your purse and count out fifty in cash, and refrain in the future from joking over our imperial property; as for the rest, you have our royal pardon.”
The whole court were astonished at Abner’s sagacity, and his majesty, too, had declared him to be a clever fellow; but all this did not recompense him for the anguish he suffered, nor console him for the loss of his dear ducats. While groaning and sighing, he took one coin after another from his purse, and before parting with it weighed it on the tip of his finger. Schnuri, the king’s jester, asked him jeeringly whether all his zecchini were tested on the stone by which the bit of Prince Abdallah’s dun horse was proved. “Your wisdom to-day has brought you fame,” said the jester; “but I would bet you another fifty ducats that you wish you had kept silent. But what says the Prophet? ‘A word once spoken can not be overtaken by a wagon, though four fleet horses were harnessed to it.’ Neither will a greyhound overtake it, Mr. Abner, even if it did not limp.”
Not long after this (to Abner) painful event, he took another walk in one of the green valleys between the foot-hills of the Atlas range of mountains. And on this occasion, just as before, he was overtaken by a company of armed men, the leader of whom called out:
“Hi! my good friend! have you not seen Goro, the emperor’s black body-guard, run by? He has run away, and must have taken this course into the mountains.”
“I can not inform you, General,” answered Abner.
“Oh! Are you not that cunning Jew who had seen neither the dog nor the horse? Don’t stand on ceremony; the slave must have passed this way; can you not scent him in the air? or can you not discover the print of his flying feet in the long grass? Speak! the slave must have passed here; he is unequalled in killing sparrows with a pea-shooter, and this is his majesty’s greatest diversion. Speak up! or I will put you in chains!”
“I can not say I have seen what I have yet not seen.”
“Jew, for the last time I ask, where is the slave? Think on the soles of your feet; think on your zecchini!”
“Oh, woe is me! Well, if you will have it that I have seen the sparrow-shooter, then run that way; if he is not there, then he is somewhere else.”
“You saw him, then?” roared the general.
“Well, yes, Mr. Officer, if you will have it so.”
The soldiers hastened off in the direction he had indicated; while Abner went home chuckling over his cunning. Before he was twenty-four hours older, however, a company of the palace guards defiled his house by entering it on the Sabbath, and dragged him into the presence of the Emperor of Morocco.
“Dog of a Jew!” shouted the emperor. “You dare to send the imperial servants, who were pursuing a fugitive, on a false scent into the mountains, while the slave was fleeing towards the coast, and very nearly escaped on a Spanish ship. Seize him, soldiers! A hundred on his soles, and a hundred zecchini from his purse! The more his feet swell under the lash, the more his purse will collapse.”
You know, O Sire, that in the kingdom of Fez and Morocco the people love swift justice; and so the poor Abner was whipped and taxed without consulting his own inclinations beforehand. He cursed his fate, that condemned his feet and his purse to suffer every time it pleased his majesty to lose any thing. As he limped out of the room, bellowing and groaning, amidst the laughter of the rough court people, Schnuri, the jester, said to him: “You ought to be contented, Abner, ungrateful Abner; is it not honor enough for you that every loss that our gracious emperor–whom God preserve–suffers, likewise arouses in your bosom the profoundest grief? But if you will promise me a good fee, I will come to your shop in Jews Alley an hour before the Sovereign of the West is to lose any thing, and say: ‘Don’t go out of your house, Abner; you know why; shut yourself up in your bedroom under lock and key until sunset.'”