PAGE 11
A Tragedy Of High Explosives
by
“No. I do not know what those letters mean,” she answered.
“Perhaps ‘H. R.’ stands for your own name,” said I.
She smiled like a happy child. “Yes, yes. That must be it. But the ‘J. B.,’ what do they stand for?”
I hesitated–who would not?
“Perhaps they stand for–for John Bruce,” I said slowly, looking her steadily in the eyes. She returned the gaze with the calm confidence of a child.
“Who is John Bruce?” she asked. “I can’t remember John Bruce.”
My heart gave a great leap, then sank like lead. Am I then such a villain that I rejoice at the thought that Helen Rankine has no memory of her lover? Where is the hate that I boasted of? It has gone. It could not live before the calm eyes of the girl by my side. But I had my duty to do.
“John Bruce is in India, Helen,” said I. “Don’t you remember? And you were going to him, and when you reached him you were to marry him. He loves you dearly, and you loved him dearly. Can’t you remember?”
The troubled look came to the dark eyes and ruffled the calm brow. A faint flush passed across the rich, warm cheeks. Then, like a spoiled child, she shook her head and said:
“No, no, no, no!” with a little pat of the foot and nod at the last “No.” “I do not know anything about it at all. I do not know John Bruce, and of course I do not love him. How could I? But I know you, Arthur, and I love you,” and she laid her hand in mine, with a pretty smile.
I wonder if I’m the same man that set sail in the Albatross six short weeks ago? The Arthur Hartley then was a mad, foolish boy. The Arthur Hartley now is a grave, serious man. I feel that years and years have passed, instead of weeks. How much I am changed let this prove: I held Helen’s hand in mine and answered gently, “I am very glad you love me, Helen. I hope you will ever love me. I certainly love you dearly. I could not love a sister more.”
She smiled at this and patted my hand, and then we sat, hand in hand, without speaking, until the shadows deepened on the deck.
May 2.–You have been much in my thoughts of late, dear mother, but you will never know it. You will never see these words. I had thought not to write in this book again, for I feel sure that it will never reach you; but I seem to be urged to keep some record of our eventful voyage. We are lying becalmed far in the Southern Atlantic, so Captain Raymond says. An awful storm that drove us at its will, and before which it seemed possible for no ship to live, has driven us here far out of our course. For six days we have been lying here motionless. The storm that raged with such terrible fury seems to have exhausted all the winds of the heavens. I never knew anything more thoroughly depressing than this calm. Even writing seems a task beyond me. But, indeed, I am not as strong as before the attack of fever. I do not seem to regain my strength. I had in mind to describe the storm. It is beyond my powers. We lost a long boat and a quantity of spars. Two sailors, one of them Richard Jones, saved but to be lost, were washed overboard and never seen again. There is no change in Helen. She is apparently perfectly happy, but it is the happiness of a contented and healthy child. She takes much pleasure in being with me, and sits by the hour with her hand in mine, while I talk of the England that we have left and of the scenes of other days. But nothing awakens the dormant memory. Uncle John has got back to his studies, and talks explosives to any one who will listen.