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A Strange Island
by
It was too much for me; and, taking advantage of the confusion that followed, I left the tragical scene as fast as possible.
A little farther on, I was shocked to see a goose dragging an old man down some steps that led to a little house.
“Dear me! what’s the matter here?” I cried.
“He won’t say his prayers,” screamed the goose.
“But perhaps he was never taught,” said I.
“It’s never too late to learn: he’s had his chance; he won’t be pious and good, so away with him. Don’t interfere, whatever you do: hold your tongue, and go about your business,” scolded the goose, who certainly had a dreadful temper.
I dared say no more; and, when the poor old man had been driven away by this foul proceeding, I went up the steps and peeped in; for I heard some one crying, and thought the cross bird, perhaps, had hurt some one else. A little old woman stood there, wringing her hands in great distress; while a small dog was barking at her with all his might.
“Bless me! the fashions have got even here,” thought I; for the old woman was dressed in the latest style,–or, rather, she had overdone it sadly; for her gown was nearly up to her knees, and she was nearly as ridiculous an object as some of the young ladies I had seen at home. She had a respectable bonnet on, however, instead of a straw saucer; and her hair was neatly put under a cap,–not made into a knob on the top of her head.
“My dear soul, what’s the trouble?” said I, quite touched by her tears.
“Lud a mercy, ma’am! I’ve been to market with my butter and eggs,–for the price of both is so high, one can soon get rich nowadays,–and, being tired, I stopped to rest a bit, but fell asleep by the road. Somebody–I think it’s a rogue of a peddler who sold me wooden nutmegs, and a clock that wouldn’t go, and some pans that came to bits the first time I used them–somebody cut my new gown and petticoat off all round, in the shameful way you see. I thought I never should get home; for I was such a fright, I actually didn’t know myself. But, thinks I, my doggy will know me; and then I shall be sure I’m I, and not some boldfaced creature in short skirts. But, oh, ma’am! doggy don’t know me; and I ain’t myself, and I don’t know what to do.”
“He’s a foolish little beast; so don’t mind him, but have a cup of tea, and go to bed. You can make your gown decent to-morrow; and, if I see the tricksy peddler, I’ll give him a scolding.”
This seemed to comfort the old woman; though doggy still barked.
“My next neighbor has a dog who never behaves in this way,” she said, as she put her teapot on the coals. “He’s a remarkable beast; and you’d better stop to see him as you pass, ma’am. He’s always up to some funny prank or other.”
I said I would; and, as I went by the next house, I took a look in at the window. The closet was empty, I observed; but the dog sat smoking a pipe, looking as grave as a judge.
“Where is your mistress?” asked I.
“Gone for some tripe,” answered the dog, politely taking the pipe out of his mouth, and adding, “I hope the smoke doesn’t annoy you.”
“I don’t approve of smoking,” said I.
“Sorry to hear it,” said the dog, coolly.
I was going to lecture him on this bad habit; but I saw his mistress coming with a dish in her hand, and, fearing she might think me rude to peep in at her windows, I walked on, wondering what we were coming to when even four-legged puppies smoked.
At the door of the next little house, I saw a market-wagon loaded with vegetables, and a smart young pig just driving it away. I had heard of this interesting family, and took a look as I passed by. A second tidy pig sat blowing the fire; and a third was eating roast-beef, as if he had just come in from his work. The fourth, I was grieved to see, looked very sulky; for it was evident he had been naughty, and so lost his dinner. The little pig was at the door, crying to get in; and it was sweet to see how kindly the others let him in, wiped his tears, tied on his bib, and brought him his bread and milk. I was very glad to see these young orphans doing so well, and I knew my friends at home would enjoy hearing from them.