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“Very well, I guess; used for lighter purposes,” said the clerk.

“Put ’em on desks, and cubber-doors, and so on?”

“Yes; they are used in a hundred ways.”

“Hinges,” says the Yankee, after a pause, “ain’t considered, I guess, a very neuw invenshun?”

“I should think not,” half smilingly replied the clerk.

“D’yeou ever see wooden hinges, mister?”

“Never,” candidly responded the clerk.

“Well, I hev,” resolutely echoed the Yankee.

“You have, eh?”

“E’ yes, plenty on ’em–eout in Illinoi; seen fellers eout there that never seen an iron hinge or a razor in their lives!”

“I wasn’t aware our western friends were so far behind the times as that,” said the clerk.

“It’s a fact –dreadful, tew, to be eout in a place like that,” continued the Yankee. “I kept school eout there, nigh on to a year; couldn’t stand it–“

“Ah, indeed!” mechanically echoed the poor clerk.

“No, sir; dreadful place, some parts of Illinoi; folks air almighty green; couldn’t tell how old they air, nuff on ’em; when they get mighty old and bald-headed, they stop and die off, of their own accord.”

“Illinois must be a healthy place?” observed the clerk.

“Healthy place! I guess not, mister; fever and ague sweetens ’em, I tell you. O, it’s dreadful, fever and ague is!”

“That caused you to leave, I suppose?” said the clerk.

“Well, e’ yes, partly; the climate, morals, and the water, kind o’ went agin me. The big boys had a way o’ fightin’, cursin’, and swearin’, pitchin’ apple cores and corn at the master, that didn’t exactly suit me. Finally, one day, at last, the boys got so confeounded sassy, and I got the fever and agy so bad, that they shook daown the school-house chimney, and I shook my hair nearly all eout by the roots, with the agy –so I packed up and slid! “

The clerk being again called away to wait on a fresh customer, the Yankee was left to his meditations and survey. Having some twenty more minutes to walk around the store, and examine the stock, he brought up opposite the clerk, who was busy tying up gimlets, screws, and stuff, for a carpenter’s apprentice. Yankee explodes again.

“Got a big steore of goods layin’ areound here, haven’t yeou?”

“We have, sir, a fair assortment,” said the clerk.

“Them Illinoi folks haven’t no idee what a place this Boston is; they haven’t. I tried to larn ’em a few things towards civilization, but ‘twaren’t no sort o’ use tryin’!”

“New country yet; the Illinois folks will brighten up after a while, I guess,” said the clerk. “Did you wish to examine any other sort of hinges, sir?” he continued.

“Hain’t I seen all yeou hev?”

“O, no; here we have another variety of hinges, steel, copper, plated, etc. These are fine for parlor doors, etc.,” said the clerk.

“E’ yes them air nice, I swow, mister; look like rale silver. I ‘spect them cost somethin’?”

“They come rather high,” said the clerk, “but we’ve got them as low as you can buy them in the market.”

“I want to know!” quietly echoes the Yankee.

“Yes, sir; what do you wish to use them for?” says the clerk.

“Use ’em?” responded the Yankee.

“Yes; what priced hinges did you require?”

“What priced hinges?–“

“Exactly! Tell me what you require them for, and I can soon come at the sort of hinges you require,” said the clerk, making an effort to come to a climax.

“Who said I wanted any hinges?”

“Who said you wanted any? Why, don’t you want to buy hinges?”

“Buy hinges? Why, no; I don’t want nothin’; I only came in to look areound! “

Having looked around, the imperturbable Yankee stepped out, leaving the poor clerk–quite flabbergasted!