PAGE 6
A Duel
by
“You might have spared me this humiliation!” he said, and his voice plainly betrayed the pain he felt.
“Are you not man enough to take the responsibility for your words and actions on your own shoulders? Are you ashamed to wear a present I gave you, while you expect me to wear yours? You’re a coward! And you imagine yourself to be a man!”
Henceforth the poor lawyer had no peace. Wherever he went, he met grinning faces, and farm-labourers and maid-servants from the safe retreat of sheltered nooks, shouted “the bull! the bull!” whenever he went past.
Adeline had resolved to attend an auction and stay away for a week. She asked her husband to look after the servants in her absence.
On the first day the cook came and asked him for money for sugar and coffee. He gave it to her. Three days later she came again and asked him for the same thing. He expressed surprise at her having already spent what he had given her.
“I don’t want it all for myself,” she replied, “and mistress doesn’t mind.”
He gave her the money. But, wondering whether he had made a mistake, he opened his wife’s account book and began to add up the columns.
He arrived at a strange result. When he had added up all the pounds for a month, he found it came to a lispound.
He continued checking her figures, and the result was everywhere the same. He took the principal ledger and found that, leaving the high figures out of the question, very stupid mistakes in the additions had been made. Evidently his wife knew nothing of denominate quantities or decimal fractions. This unheard of cheating of the servants must certainly lead to ruin.
His wife came home. After having listened to a detailed account of the auction, he cleared his throat, intending to tell his tale, but his wife anticipated his report:
“Well, and how did you get on with the servants?”
“Oh! very well, but I am certain that they cheat you.”
“Cheat me!”
“Yes; for instance the amount spent on coffee and sugar is too large.”
“How do you know?”
“I saw it in your account book.”
“Indeed! You poked your nose into my books?”
“Poked my nose into your books? No, but I took it upon me to check your….”
“What business was it of yours?”
“And I found that you keep books without having the slightest knowledge of denominate quantities or decimal fractions.”
“What? You think I don’t know?”
“No, you don’t! And therefore the foundations of the establishment are shaky. Your book-keeping is all humbug, old girl!”
“My book-keeping concerns no one but myself.”
“Incorrect book-keeping is an offence punishable by law; if you are not liable, then I am.”
“The law? I care a fig for the law!”
“I daresay! But we shall get into its clutches, if not you, then most certainly I! And therefore I am going to be book-keeper in the future.”
“We can engage a man to do it.”
“No, that’s not necessary! I have nothing else to do.”
And that settled the matter.
But once the husband occupied the chair at the desk and the people came to see him, the wife lost all interest in farming and cattle-breeding.
A violent reaction set in; she no longer attended to the cows and calves, but remained in the house. There she sat, hatching fresh plots.
But the husband had regained a fresh hold on life. He took an eager interest in the estate and woke up the people. Now he held the reins; managed everything, gave orders and paid the bills.
One day his wife came into the office and asked him for a thousand crowns to buy a piano.
“What are you thinking of?” said the husband. “Just when we are going to re-build the stables! We haven’t the means to buy a piano.”
“What do you mean?” she replied. “Why haven’t we got the means? Isn’t my money sufficient?”
“Your money?”
“Yes, my money, my dowry.”
“That has now become the property of the family.”