No. 323 [from The Spectator]
by
No. 323
Tuesday, March 11, 1712. Addison.
Modo Vir, modo Foemina. [1]
Virg.
The journal with which I presented my Reader on Tuesday last, has brought me in several Letters, with Accounts of many private Lives cast into that Form. I have the Rakes Journal, the Sots Journal, the Whoremasters Journal, and among several others a very curious Piece, entituled, The Journal of a Mohock. By these Instances I find that the Intention of my last Tuesdays Paper has been mistaken by many of my Readers. I did not design so much to expose Vice as Idleness, and aimed at those Persons who pass away their Time rather in Trifle and Impertinence, than in Crimes and Immoralities. Offences of this latter kind are not to be dallied with, or treated in so ludicrous a manner. In short, my Journal only holds up Folly to the Light, and shews the Disagreeableness of such Actions as are indifferent in themselves, and blameable only as they proceed from Creatures endow’d with Reason.
My following Correspondent, who calls her self Clarinda, is such a Journalist as I require: She seems by her Letter to be placed in a modish State of Indifference between Vice and Virtue, and to be susceptible of either, were there proper Pains taken with her. Had her Journal been filled with Gallantries, or such Occurrences as had shewn her wholly divested of her natural Innocence, notwithstanding it might have been more pleasing to the Generality of Readers, I should not have published it; but as it is only the Picture of a Life filled with a fashionable kind of Gaiety and Laziness, I shall set down five Days of it, as I have received it from the Hand of my fair Correspondent.
Dear Mr. SPECTATOR,
You having set your Readers an Exercise in one of your last Weeks Papers, I have perform’d mine according to your Orders, and herewith send it you enclosed. You must know, Mr. SPECTATOR, that I am a Maiden Lady of a good Fortune, who have had several Matches offered me for these ten Years last past, and have at present warm Applications made to me by a very pretty Fellow. As I am at my own Disposal, I come up to Town every Winter, and pass my Time in it after the manner you will find in the following Journal, which I begun to write upon the very Day after your Spectator upon that Subject.
TUESDAY Night. Could not go to sleep till one in the Morning for thinking of my Journal.
WEDNESDAY. From Eight till Ten, Drank two Dishes of Chocolate in Bed, and fell asleep after em.
From Ten to Eleven. Eat a Slice of Bread and Butter, drank a Dish of Bohea, read the Spectator.
From Eleven to One. At my Toilet, try’d a new Head. Gave Orders for Veny to be combed and washed. Mem. I look best in Blue.
From One till Half an Hour after Two. Drove to the Change. Cheapned a Couple of Fans.
Till Four. At Dinner. Mem. Mr. Froth passed by in his new Liveries.
From Four to Six. Dressed, paid a Visit to old Lady Blithe and her Sister, having before heard they were gone out of Town that Day.
From Six to Eleven. At Basset. Mem. Never set again upon the Ace of Diamonds.
THURSDAY. From Eleven at Night to Eight in the Morning. Dream’d that I punted to Mr. Froth.
From Eight to Ten. Chocolate. Read two Acts in Aurenzebe [2] abed.
From Ten to Eleven. Tea-Table. Sent to borrow Lady Faddles Cupid for Veny. Read the Play-Bills. Received a Letter from Mr. Froth. Mem. locked it up in my strong Box.
Rest of the Morning. Fontange, the Tire-woman, her Account of my Lady Blithe’s Wash. Broke a Tooth in my little Tortoise-shell Comb. Sent Frank to know how my Lady Hectick rested after her Monky’s leaping out at Window. Looked pale. Fontange tells me my Glass is not true. Dressed by Three.