The Curse Of Wealth
by
“WHAT shall I put my dollars in?” he asked, in wild dismay.
“I’ve fifty thousand of ’em, and I’d like to keep ’em too.
I’d like to put them by to serve some future rainy day,
But in these times of queer finance what can a fellow do?
“A railway bond is picturesque, and the supply is great,
But strangely like a novel that upon occasion drags,
Of which the critics of the time in hackneyed phrases state,
‘The work has certain value, but the int’rest often flags!’
“The same is true of railway shares, ’tis safer to invest
In ploughshares, so it seems to me, in this unhappy time.
Some think great wealth a blessing, but it cannot stand the test;
He’s happier by far than I who’s but a single dime.
“He does not lie awake at night and fret and fume, to think
Of bank officials on a spree with what he’s toiled to get.
He is not driven by his woe quite to the verge of drink
By wondering if his balance in the bank remains there yet.
“He does not pick the paper up in terror every night
To see if V.B.G. is up, or P.D.Q. is down;
It does not fill his anxious soul with nerve-destroying fright
To hear the Wall Street rumors that are flying ’bout the town.
“Ah, better had I ta’en that cash that I have skimped to save,
And spent it on my living and my pleasures day by day!
I would not now be goaded nigh unto my waiting grave,
By wondering how the deuce to keep those dollars mine for aye.
“I’d not be bankrupt in my nerves and prematurely old,
These golden shackles must be burst; I must again be free.
What Ho without! My ducats-to the winds with all my gold,
That I may once again enjoy the rest of poverty.”