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Sound And Fury
by [?]

MISS LORE–Excuse me, Mr. Penne, for venturing a suggestion; but don’t you think you might state that in a less coarse manner?

MR. PENNE (astounded)–Wh-wh–I’m afraid I fail to understand you.

MISS LORE–His condition. Why not say he was “full” or “intoxicated”? It would sound much more elegant than the way you express it.

MR. PENNE (still darkly wandering)–Will you kindly point out, Miss Lore, where I have intimated that Cortland was “full,” if you prefer that word?

MISS LORE (calmly consulting her stenographic notes)–It is right here, word for word. (Reads.) “Afterward he set out for a stroll with a skate on.”

MR. PENNE (with peculiar emphasis)–Ah! And now will you kindly take down the expurgated phrase? (Dictates.) “Afterward he set out for a stroll with, as Kate on one occasion had fancifully told him, her spirit leaning upon his arm.”


Mr. PENNE (dictates)–Chapter thirty-four. Heading–“What Kate Found in the Garden.” “That fragrant summer morning brought gracious tasks to all. The bees were at the honeysuckle blossoms on the porch. Kate, singing a little song, was training the riotous branches of her favorite woodbine. The sun, himself, had rows—-“

MISS LORE–Shall I say “had risen”?

MR. PENNE (very slowly and with desperate deliberation)–“The–sun– himself–had–rows–of–blushing–pinks–and–bollyhocks–and– hyacinths–waiting–that–he–might–dry–their–dew-drenched–cups.”


MR. PENNE(dictates)–“The earliest trolley, scattering the birds from its pathway like some marauding cat, brought Cortland over from Oldport. He had forgotten his fair–“

MISS LORE–Hm! Wonder how he got the conductor to—-

Mr. PENNE (very loudly)–“Forgotten his fair and roseate visions of the night in the practical light of the sober morn.”


MR. PENNE (dictates)–“He greeted her with his usual smile and manner. ‘See the waves,’ he cried, pointing to the heaving waters of the sea, ‘ever wooing and returning to the rockbound shore.'” “‘Ready to break,’ Kate said, with—-“

MISS LORE–My! One evening he has his arm around her, and the next morning he’s ready to break her head! Just like a man!

MR. PENNE (with suspicious calmness)–There are times, Miss Lore, when a man becomes so far exasperated that even a woman–But suppose we finish the sentence. (Dictates.) “‘Ready to break,’ Kate said, with the thrilling look of a soul-awakened woman, ‘into foam and spray, destroying themselves upon the shore they love so well.”


MR. PENNE (dictates)–“Cortland, in Kate’s presence heard faintly the voice of caution. Thirty years had not cooled his ardor. It was in his power to bestow great gifts upon this girl. He still retained the beliefs that he had at twenty.” (To Miss Lore, wearily) I think that will be enough for the present.

MISS LORE (wisely)–Well, if he had the twenty that he believed he had, it might buy her a rather nice one.

MR. PENNE (faintly)–The last sentence was my own. We will discontinue for the day, Miss Lore.

MISS LORE–Shall I come again to-morrow?

MR. PENNE (helpless under the spell)–If you will be so good.

(Exit Miss Lore.)