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“I sympathise with the civil power,” said Cleever. “Continue, young Clive.”

“The fun of it was, that he was supposed to be our superior officer. Hicksey took a good look at him, and told him to attach himself to my party. Beastly mean of Hicksey, that. The chap kept on edging in and bothering, instead of asking for some men and taking up his own position, till I got angry, and the carbines began popping on the other side of the village. Then I said, ‘For God’s sake be quiet, and sit down where you are! If you see anybody come out of the village, shoot at him.’ I knew he couldn’t hit a hayrick at a yard. Then I took my men over the garden wall – over the palisades, y’ know – somehow or other, and the fun began. Hicksey had found the Boh in bed under a mosquito-curtain, and he had taken a flying jump on to him.”

“A flying jump!” said Cleever. “Is that also war?”

“Yes,” said The Infant, now thoroughly warmed. “Don’t you know how you take a flying jump on to a fellow’s head at school, when he snores in the dormitory? The Boh was sleeping in a bedful of swords and pistols, and Hicksey came down like Zazel through the netting, and the net got mixed up with the pistols and the Boh and Hicksey, and they all rolled on the floor together. I laughed till I couldn’t stand, and Hicksey was cursing me for not helping him; so I left him to fight it out and went into the village. Our men were slashing about and firing, and so were the dacoits, and in the thick of the mess some ass set fire to a house, and we all had to clear out. I froze on to the nearest daku and ran to the palisade, shoving him in front of me. He wriggled loose and bounded over the other side. I came after him; but when I had one leg one side and one leg the other of the palisade, I saw that the daku had fallen flat on Dennis’s head. That man had never moved from where I left him. They rolled on the ground together, and Dennis’s carbine went off and nearly shot me. The daku picked himself up and ran, and Dennis buzzed his carbine after him, and it caught him on the back of his head and knocked him silly. You never saw anything so funny in your life. I doubled up on the top of the palisade and hung there, yelling with laughter. But Dennis began to weep like anything. ‘Oh, I’ve killed a man,’ he said. ‘I’ve killed a man, and I shall never know another peaceful hour in my life. Is he dead? Oh, is he dead? Good Lord, I’ve killed a man!’ I came down and said, ‘Don’t be a fool;’ but he kept on shouting, ‘Is he dead?’ till I could have kicked him. The daku was only knocked out of time with the carbine. He came to after a bit, and I said, ‘Are you hurt much?’ He groaned and said, ‘No.’ His chest was all cut with scrambling over the palisade. ‘The white man’s gun didn’t do that,’ he said; ‘I did that, and I knocked the white man over.’ Just like a Burman, wasn’t it? But Dennis wouldn’t be happy at any price. He said: ‘Tie up his wounds. He’ll bleed to death. Oh, he’ll bleed to death!’ ‘Tie ’em up yourself,’ I said, ‘if you’re so anxious.’ ‘I can’t touch him,’ said Dennis, ‘but here’s my shirt.’ He took off his shirt, and fixed the braces again over his bare shoulders. I ripped the shirt up, and bandaged the dacoit quite professionally. He was grinning at Dennis all the time; and Dennis’s haversack was lying on the ground, bursting full of sandwiches. Greedy hog! I took some, and offered some to Dennis. ‘How can I eat?’ he said. ‘How can you ask me to eat? His very blood is on your hands now, and you’re eating my sandwiches!’ ‘All right,’ I said; ‘I’ll give ’em to the daku.’ So I did, and the little chap was quite pleased, and wolfed ’em down like one o’clock.”