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PAGE 4

A Bad Example
by [?]

But when he came down Parliament Street to Westminster Abbey he felt a different atmosphere, and he was roused to Jeremiac indignation at the sight, in a passing cab, of a gilded youth in an opera hat, with his coat buttoned up to hide his dress clothes.

‘That’s the sort of young feller I can’t abide,’ said Mr Clinton. ‘And if I was a member of Parliament I’d stop it. That’s what comes of ‘aving too much money and nothing to do. If I was a member of the aristocracy I’d give my sons five years in an accountant’s office. There’s nothing like a sound business training for making a man.’ He paused in the road and waved his disengaged hand. ‘Now, what should I be if I ‘adn’t ‘ad a sound business training?’

Mr Clinton arrived at the mortuary, a gay red and white building, which had been newly erected and consecrated by a duke with much festivity and rejoicing. Mr Clinton was sworn with the other jurymen, and with them repaired to see the bodies on which they were to sit. But Mr Clinton was squeamish.

‘I don’t like corpses,’ he said. ‘I object to them on principle.’

He was told he must look at them.

‘Very well,’ said Mr Clinton. ‘You can take a ‘orse to the well but you can’t make ‘im drink.’ When it came to his turn to look through the pane of glass behind which was the body, he shut his eyes.

‘I can’t say I’m extra gone on corpses,’ he said, as they walked back to the Court. ‘The smell of them ain’t what you might call eau-de-Cologne.’ The other jurymen laughed. Mr Clinton often said witty things like that.

‘Well, gentlemen,’ said the coroner, rubbing his hands, ‘we’ve only got three cases this morning, so I sha’n’t have to keep you long. And they all seem to be quite simple.’

V

The first was an old man of seventy; he had been a respectable, hard-working man till two years before, when a paralytic stroke had rendered one side of him completely powerless. He lost his work. He was alone in the world–his wife was dead, and his only daughter had not been heard of for thirty years–and gradually he had spent his little savings; one by one he sent his belongings to the pawn shop, his pots and pans, his clothes, his arm-chair, finally his bedstead, then he died. The doctor said the man was terribly emaciated, his stomach was shrivelled up for want of food, he could have eaten nothing for two days before death…. The jury did not trouble to leave the box; the foreman merely turned round and whispered to them a minute; they all nodded, and a verdict was returned in accordance with the doctor’s evidence!

The next inquiry was upon a child of two. The coroner leant his head wearily on his hand, such cases were so common! The babe’s mother came forward to give her evidence–a pale little woman, with thin and hollow cheeks, her eyes red and dim with weeping. She sobbed as she told the coroner that her husband had left her, and she was obliged to support herself and two children. She was out of work, and food had been rather scanty; she had suckled the dead baby as long as she could, but her milk dried up. Two days before, on waking up in the morning, the child she held in her arms was cold and dead. The doctor shrugged his shoulders. Want of food! And the jury returned their verdict, framed in a beautiful and elaborate sentence, in accordance with the evidence.

The last case was a girl of twenty. She had been found in the Thames; a bargee told how he saw a confused black mass floating on the water, and he put a boat-hook in the skirt, tying the body up to the boat while he called the police, he was so used to such things! In the girl’s pocket was found a pathetic little letter to the coroner, begging his pardon for the trouble she was causing, saying she had been sent away from her place, and was starving, and had resolved to put an end to her troubles by throwing herself in the river. She was pregnant. The medical man stated that there were signs on the body of very great privation, so the jury returned a verdict that the deceased had committed suicide whilst in a state of temporary insanity!